Great Hopes

Follow Me!

2010-01-04T23:21:00.000-07:00

I am now blogging at: Green Days.

Join me, won't you?

Green days. Deep deep in the sea. Cool and quiet fish. That's me.
~Dr. Seuss, 'My Many Colored Days'

Christmas In Heaven

2009-12-06T14:10:00.007-07:00

It's two weeks now since my mom has passed away. Feels like only minutes.. feels like years. Losing someone this close to you is a very disconcerting thing. It's hard now to believe that we all spent her last 40 days and nights at mom's bedside, and held her hand while she breathed her last breath. We are all starting to get on with our lives a bit.. I've started working out again (very therapeutic thank god) and am trying to think back to all the work-related balls that I dropped when mom became so ill. My siblings are trying to get back into their jobs and lives.. and my dad is very slowly learning how to live without his soulmate. Not an easy process for any of us, and especially difficult for my father.
We set up a fundraising website in mom's honor and asked that people give donations rather than send flowers, etc. We have actually raised $6,695 to date!! We are donating to the Triple Negative Breast Cancer Foundation. Triple negative is an aggressive form of bc, and is a more rare subtype - lesser-known, lesser-researched, and difficult to treat.
A good friend of my parents' sent this poem to us recently, and I thought it was nice:

Christmas In Heaven
It's Christmas in Heaven
What a beautiful sight
It's my first one here
And everythings alright

The crib is adorned
With the brilliance of stars
Wisemen have come
From Venus and Mars.

I've met all our dear ones
Who preceded us here
The reunion was lovely
An event full of cheer.

And tonight we'll all gather
in reverence we'll kneel
For the Babe in the cradle
Up in heaven is Real.

I think of my Family
That I left behind
And I pray that your Christmas
Is as blessed as mine.

Please shed no more tears
For my soul is at rest
Just Love one another
Live life to it's best.

Yes, It's Christmas in Heaven
So I've heard them say
Yet, Christmas in Heaven
Happens here Every Day!

To donate: www.firstgiving.com/ruthmorgan

2009-11-16T21:10:00.001-07:00

One night I dreamed a dream.
I was walking along the beach with my Lord. Across the dark sky flashed scenes from my life. For each scene, I noticed two sets of footprints in the sand, one belonging to me and one to my Lord.

When the last scene of my life shot before me I looked back at the footprints in the sand. There was only one set of footprints. I realized that this was at the lowest and saddest times of my life. This always bothered me and I questioned the Lord about my dilemma.

"Lord, You told me when I decided to follow You, You would walk and talk with me all the way. But I'm aware that during the most troublesome times of my life there is only one set of footprints. I just don't understand why, when I need You most, You leave me."

He whispered, "My precious child, I love you and will never leave you, never, ever, during your trials and testings. When you saw only one set of footprints, It was then that I carried you."

Happy Birthday Baby Girl!

2009-08-13T14:22:00.005-07:00

The 13th was Devika's 2nd birthday!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEVI!!!
Yes, this is a late post. I wrote most of this ON her b-day.. but alas.. was unable to finish until today! Life just gets in the way these days!
This was a pretty lo-key birthday for her. We are not throwing her 'real' party until September 12th - when we are throwing one big bash for both girls together (Maya's b-day is 9/9). On the 13th, we had some cake/ice-cream and opened presents. As she has no idea what any of this is anyhow.. I don't think she minded!
It's a good thing that we did not plan a big party for the actual date. Maya came down with the flu last week, and her pediatrician was 98% sure that it was the H1N1/Swine flu. Whatever flu it was, it was nasty. It hit her Monday afternoon, and she was more sick that night and the entire next day than I have ever seen her. Since they started her on Tamiflu, she improved quickly.
Luckily, Devi and the rest of us did not pick up this flu. I have been sick with some type of cold virus the past few days.. but I don't think it is the flu. No fever.. and according to Maya's pediatrician, the local strain of the H1N1 flu is characterized by high fever and body aches. I'm sure I just have some other crazy virus that I picked up from the kids! Hopefully I feel better tomorrow. Sure is difficult to single-parent two little kids when you feel like not moving from your bed. ugh. Of course Aj has been traveling this week - and uber-busy when he isn't.
Speaking of my baby girl though.. Devi has now been evaluated by a few different OT's and they all have come to the same decision - that she has sensory processing disorder. She actually, to me (and Aj), seems to be getting worse rather than better - when you look over her behavior compared to her timeline of being home. I'm glad we had her evaluated and have begun therapy. She needs it.
The poor girl - she has the sensory issues that cause her to need 'overstimulation'. She runsrunsruns and smacks herself into things constantly (on purpose). She rarely stops running or climbing. She hurts herself on a regular basis and doesn't 'learn' from these instances. She will continue to bang her head against something - or climb back onto something she fell from, throw herself from something, etcetc. She is a holy terror at playgrounds. I made the mistake of taking both Devika and Maya to a park recently - and had to spend the ENTIRE time managing Devi. She FLEW up to the highest point of the playground equipment - while I was chasing her (not so easy for mommy to fit thru these stupid things!) and was getting ready to throw herself down a very tall and steep slide - just before I reached her.
And good lord, if you stop her from doing something that might kill her (or if you EVER - no matter how nicely - tell her 'no') - prepare for uber-tantrum. She still throws her head and body back - no matter what might or might not be behind her - and shrieks/rolls around/'pinballs' from one structure to another. It is very exhausting (for me, obviously not for her!).
I also found out, interestingly enough, that her velcro-chewing-fetish is a sign of this disorder. Nice to know, as I was beginning to wonder if she was part puppy. ;) And actually she doesn't chew the velcro - she licks it. Interesting. Shoes, toys, chair cushions, you name it. The OT said that it is actually a good thing for her right now, as it is a calming mechanism for her. So now I'm looking for a sensory toy that she can lick safely. I think I"ll just get her a stuffed toy that has different textures on it (you know - the baby toy/baby blankets that you see all over).. and stick some velcro pieces to it.
Devi is also being tested b/c she is not growing properly. She is still under the 3% point for everything.. and has only managed to gain 2 lbs since February. Her doctor is very concerned. We are doing a bunch of labwork and looking for anything disease/disorder related. Her doctor is hoping that something turns up - as that will be treatable. We have also been referred to a doctor in the nutrtion clinic at the Children's Hospital. Thank GOD we live only 30 minutes from that hospital - as we have been there so very often now.
Devi's pediatrician told me that if nothing changes soon.. we will likely be doing growth hormones when she is preschool age. Another referral to another Children's Hospital doctor. My life is spent at doctors and therapists lately! Not that I am complaining though.. I feel so sorry for Devika having to go through all of this. I hope it isn't a difficult road to get her on track.
Other than that, only other new things are that the girls both started school today - FINALLY! It officially began last week, but the flu prevented me from sending them until today. Actually.. Maya attended on Monday, but Devi had labwork on that day. It's a church-preschool, and they are both going to attend 3 days/week. This way I can try to get back into working a little. I hope Devika works out ok in this school - I'm a tad concerned. But we'll see. If not, I'll pull her out and deal with it. I'd just like to do some work and try to make a bit of an income.
A few people have asked about my mom.. she is doing ok these days. Well.. as 'ok' as she can be. Still on chemo every week.. still losing weight (she is a toothpick).. still always exhausted. She has been fighting some major depression lately, so her doctor is hooking her up with some therapy and a change in some meds. I very much hope this helps her. Can't blame her for being depressed, that's for sure. She has been such a strong fighter for so very long, it must be ungodly difficult for her. She has been on chemo, fighting this recurrence now for 2 1/2 years. Scary scary scary. We're going to visit her next week. I hope she is ok enough to enjoy the girls a little bit.
So that's the latest. Personally, I'm just spending my time taking care of the girls and feeling guilty that I have no time to pull the ungodly amt of weeds in our yard. I miss doing landscaping work.. but have found that there is just NO time for this unless both girls nap (HA!). Maya hates hot weather, so she won't go outside with me when it is hot - and it has been quite warm lately. Hopefully I'll have some time for this when they go to school.
I'm also continuing my training.. I'm going to do a duathlon at the end of September. I'm pretty excited that there will be no possibility of drowning in this race! :)
Hope you all are doing well! I seem to have no time to read blogs these days (or to write blogs.. obviously!).. but maybe life will slow down a little in the near future. Happy end-of-summer!

I Am A Triathlete!

2009-08-04T15:59:00.002-07:00

Who would ever have guessed????

Finally A New Post!

2009-07-17T14:33:00.001-07:00

Maya's vocab translation:
Physical Therapy: Piz-sickle Therapy
Energy Bar: Injury Bar
Mom's Convertible: Mom's In-vertible
Kneepads (they came with her bike helmet): Knee Helmets

Maya and her famous conversations:
Maya {to her babysitter, in the car}: Excuse me Miss J, Excuse me MIss J!!
Miss J: Yes Maya?
Maya: You need to put both of your hands on the steering wheel. My mommy drives with two hands, you need to use two hands.

Maya {to a babysitter - who, btw, is 17 yrs old}: Do you have kids?
B: No
Maya: Why not?
B: I'm not old enough to have kids yet.
Maya: Well.. I think you need to go buy one.
B: Buy one??
Maya: Yes, there is a store for that.

Maya loves her 'The Safe Side' DVD (btw, i highly recommend it!!). During the show, they often give important safety tips and refer to them as 'Hot Tips!'. Today she came to me after watching the show and asked,
"Mommy? Do Hot Tips burn you?"

Maya was talking to her cousin, Andrew, on the phone today. After a few minutes of chatting, I heard her say:
"Hold on Andrew, talk to Bear for a minute".. she then walked the phone over to her bear (who was seated in the high chair having lunch I guess) and held the phone up to bear's ear. I could hear Andrew calling "Hello?? Helloooooo???" Hilarious!

One of my fav things to say when someone does something good is 'You're a rockstar!'. Daddy was recently putting a new doorknob on one of the doors. Maya was very interested in this and thought that it was quite a feat. She came running over to me yelling excitedly: "Mommy! Mommy! Come quick! Daddy put on a new doorknob!"
"Hey Daddy - you're a STARROCKER!!"
At this point, Dad and I had to laugh.. which made Maya a bit put-out. She amended her compliment: "Daddy.. you're.. you're.. BATMAN! DAddy is Batman! AND a starrocker."

Ahh.. I luv it when kids are this age! So cute.. so innocent. And.. you have to be SO careful what you say in front of them! Every time I try to explain something to Maya, I have to think about how it could be twisted and said back to someone else at god-knows-what-point. It's a challenge really.
Kids are doing great.. things are going well. Maya is outspoken and hilarious as always. She can be super-sweet one moment and horribly mean the next. She talks to the flowers outside if they are dying (ok, most of them are - I have no green thumbs!) and gives them kisses to help them grow. "Flowers need kisses too, Mommy"
With all the cute comments, however, come the painful ones. She sometimes thinks she can tell Mommy to 'shut-up' - which is NEVER a good thing. Last night she was put in her room to sleep at 7 pm (rather than 8:30 - which has been her bedtime recently) due to her inability to control her mouth. Sigh. I am sooo not looking forward to the teenage years!!
Devi is adjusting well to our family and becoming her own stubborn little person! She loves to scream 'MINE! MINE!' and yank toys away from her sister. She has the loudest, most blood-curdling yell I have ever heard. Our neighbors must think there is some bizarre form of child torture going on in our house every day!
Devi is, however, doing great. I don't feel like I have much to write about her. She chases her sister, plays, screams. She has to know where Maya is at every minute. If she doesn't see her, she will run around the house screaming 'mayA! mayA! mayA!' She does NOT like to be told 'No', and she throws immense tantrums - throwing her body into cabinets, backwards on the floor (or whatever might be behind her) at full speed, rolling across the room. She will be a great actress someday!
She is getting very good at going up and down the stairs. She has actually almost beat Maya on these skills - at 23 months! Awesome. She luvs Maya - gets a huge smile on her face every time that she sees her. Maya luvs her back - can't wait to see and play with her every day. Of course, they also love to fight with each other - but I have sisters - I know how that is!
Things are going very well, other than Devika is sick at least every 2-3 weeks. The pediatrician said that it is probably due to the fact that she was so premature.. pretty routine for preemie babies I guess. Blah.. poor Devi!

In other news, I'm still training for the Tri For The Cure Triathlon. Yes, that's right. I am now an athlete. ;) I really have been doing a decent job of training, though. I've surprised myself. I swim, bike, or run - or a combo of those - every day. I've recently begun transferring my swimming to open water, which has been very difficult for me. I paniced the first couple of times and could not swim at all (tho I can swim 45 min straight in my Endless Pool). Today was the first time that I was actually able to swim the 1/2 mile course that they have set up in a local lake. YAY!!! Very happy and feeling more confident now.
I'm very happy that a friend of mine talked me into training for this Tri.. I feel so much better about myself. I'm healthy, energetic, and driven. For the first time in my life (finally - at almost 39!!) I am in great physical shape. Other triathletes that I see at the reservoir, bike shop, etc.. always are surprised to hear that I'm training for my first Tri b/c I look so in-shape. So I guess that, even if I don't do well in the actual race, at least I look the part!! :D Hopefully I keep this up and don't slug-out again after Aug. 2nd. It's also nice to have something that is for 'me'. I know you moms out there will understand that. Especially as I'm not working much these days - waiting until the kids are in school this fall (well, school -slash- part-time childcare). It's hard for me not to work - I'm the personality type that really needs it. This race is filling that little 'missing piece'.

Well, hopefully I can update my blog more often and not post god-awfully long posts once every few months! I'd be surprised if anyone was still reading at this point! I'll try to do better.. at least post some photos more often (sorry, sorry!). :D

Flower Power

2009-06-16T20:20:00.002-07:00

So as you can see, Maya made her debut as 'Flower Girl' for the first time this past weekend! PHEW. That was a somewhat.. oh.. painful? experience for Mommy. ;) But all's well that ends well. Or just ends.
I know, I know.. you are always treading into the unknown when a child this young takes part in a wedding - and frankly it's half the fun! But maybe not for the parents. Or parent.. as Aj was unable to travel with us due to a work commitment. I was photographing some parts of the wedding - it was my niece getting married - and trying to keep an eye on Maya/get her to walk down the aisle. We were able to finally get her to walk down the aisle, but only holding the maid-of-honor's hand. It was 3:30 pm and she was waaaay past the melting point. She somehow made it down the aisle. No flower petals were thrown and no ring of flowers was worn on the head.. but she made it! Whoohoo!! I had to be proud of that huge accomplishment!
I will have renewed respect for parents of flower girls/ring bearers in the weddings that I photograph!
Maya had a great time at the reception though. Once the music started, look out! She was a dancing queen! She kept trying to pull little boys out onto the dance floor with her, but none of them were agreeable. I think she intimidated them with her .. 'moves'. She was having huge fun. So fun to watch! It was all fun until she vomited.. twice. After the 2nd incident, it was time to go home. Too much fun had been had. I had photographed everything that I needed to get for my niece, and it was time to go back into Mommy mode. It was very nice of my family to help watch her while I was working tho - so if you are reading this (Mike, Christy, Charlie, etc) - THANK YOU!!! I got some great photos and could not have done it without your help.

Sooo.. what else is new? So long since we have sat down to have a chat!
I'm still training for the Tri-For-The-Cure. Hopefully I get comfortable on my bike - it's the only part I'm concerned about right now. Only reason for concern is that I JUST got it (well, it's Aj's old bike, all fixed up and ready to go). I have not ridden a bike in - oh - 15/20 years? I can ride it, but I'm paranoid as hell and feel like I'm going to hit a rock or something and wipe out at any moment. Where is my youthful confidence? What has happened?? I thought it was '..just like riding a bike..''? Who made up that ridiculous expression?? Obviously not someone who is as un-coordinated as I am.
But I'll be fine. I will ride that stupid thing every day until August 2nd and I WILL kick butt. I'm ready to meet the challenge.
And along those lines.. my mom is still holding her own in her fight against her cancer. YAY! GO MAMA!! She is sooo very tired all the time - and her back hurts quite often and quite a lot.. but she is living life, going out, and fighting hard. It was great to see her for the short time that I was able to this past weekend. Miss her.
Maya was sooo cute with her, btw. She kept asking mom how she was feeling and saying '..are you ok, sweetie??'. Sometimes she would gently stroke her grandma's face or arm.. and occasionally go get her a blanket and put it over her legs. SO adorable.
I actually had to do some photos for my niece and left Maya with my parents - they took her to dinner one night and to lunch one afternoon - and Maya was awesome! It was her first outing without me.. and she was super well-behaved. Didn't eat anything of course.. but that's normal. I was very proud! {not to mention relieved!!}

In child-medical-news: All of our freak-outs from the Int'l Adoption Clinic were laid to rest. PHEW. Good god if they didn't scare the crap out of us for what turned out to be nothing really. {eye roll} But hey - good news is good news. Glad it isn't bad news, so I won't complain much about that. Devi does have strabismus - which means a bit of eye-crossing. The opthamalogist said that it isn't bad at all and he is sure it is due to prematurity and malnutrition. He thinks that a year of hi-cal diet will make a huge difference, so we will revisit this in one year.
Devi did qualify for some PT and/or OT. We will be beginning that sometime in the next month or so. I tend to think that this is ridiculous and she doesn't need it.. but we'll see how the first session goes. The evaluators from the state did not impress me, and I think they were concerned about things that are not concerning. But whatever. We'll see.
Maya will be starting PT in a couple of weeks, which is actually very good. The orthopedist did not see any major issues with her and feels that PT will make a huge difference. He also told us that her leg pains are due to a milk allergy (which she was skin-tested for and that was negative). We did not really believe him, but we removed dairy from her diet.. and voila! The leg aches mostly went away! WOW! I'll be darned.
She does have problems with her joints/muscle tone though. The more active she is this summer, the more problems we are running into. She is turning her ankles or twisting her knees on almost a daily basis. And then she is in pain for a day or two. So yes, she has been in pain almost every day for the past couple of weeks. We actually can see it when it happens, so at least we know what we are dealing with. PT will be a great thing for her.

We went to DisneyWorld, Orlando a couple of weeks ago. What a great trip! The girls did smashingly well - I was pleasantly surprised. And I, of course, loved it! I am a huge Disney fan. Can't wait to go back someday!
So Maya and Devika are both doing very well. Devi is starting to talk more - she said 'thank you' today for the first time.. and is starting to occasionally say an entire word rather than just the first sound of a word. She is still throwing huge holy terror tantrums when she is with Maya and they are fighting for my attention. This is something that we are just going to have to work through over time. And of course, when she starts HER tantrums.. Maya has to make sure that she is not overshadowed. Our household is often very very loud! But we'll get past it, painful as it is.
It constantly amazes me how much I love these two little girls! They can scream and yell.. tell me that they don't love me (that one was hard at first but I'm totally immune to it now! and of course that is only Maya so far..).. tell me that they want to 'pour chocolate on me and push me' (hmm.. that actually doesn't sound so bad!) - and then in the next moment, I get huge hugs and wet kisses. I get told over and over how much they love me (ok that's just Maya also, but Devi hugs, kisses, and neck-snuggles). Maya crawls into bed with us almost daily.. and I want to be stern and force her back into her bed.. but then she snuggles up to me, strokes my cheek with her hand, gives me the loviest-eye look that anyone could ever give (those immense pools of black that are her eyes!), smooches on me, and with the cutest little loving smile, she tells me how she just loves me soooo, soooo very much. Yikes. Owch. Sigh.
Some recent Maya-quips:
On the plane to IN, just Maya and I. She is at the window, I'm in the middle. Some nice young man sitting next to me. Maya leans over and asks, 'Excuse me? Excuse me??? WHY are you sitting next to my Mama??' She did this on 3-4 different occasions during the flight. Poor thing.. could not understand the seating situation on a plane!

Waiting for the plane, watching them fuel-up through the window: 'MOMMY! MOMMY! They are putting fuel into the airplane's arms!!'

On the plane, in response to the flight attendant's request for our drink order: Maya (loudly): 'I want apple juice. That is good for my poo-poos.'

Maya - to her babysitter (who, incidentally, is caucasian): 'Miss J, what chocolate are you?'
Miss J: 'Chocolate??'
Maya: 'Hmm.. I think you are white chocolate like my mommy. I'm milk chocolate. Daddy is dark chocolate.'

Maya: 'Mommy, I think we need to sit down and talk about our feelings. We are having a confrontation.'

Where To Begin?

2009-06-02T14:56:00.003-07:00

Wow - it's been way too long since I have had the time to blog! Time.. or energy. Splitting time between the girls, training for the sprint triathlon coming up in early August, and way too much recent travel - leads to no time for blogging.
I have a blog entry coming soon.. we just returned from DisneyWorld, etc.. some fun things to update. No time at the moment, but I wanted to upload these videos for the amusement of my sister (who is the person talking to Maya on the phone). My chatty little mini-teenager:

Reflections on Motherhood

2009-05-09T20:21:00.003-07:00

Happy Mother’s Day to all of you wonderful moms out there!

I am so happy to be celebrating this Mother’s Day as a mommy of two sweet and adorable little girls. This is the first Mothers Day in over 4 years that we are not awaiting one of our children from India. Prior to those 4 years, I spent 4 years avoiding even the thought of this holiday because we were struggling with the intense sadness and frustration of infertility. This year is truly joyous – we have both of our children home with us and, at least for the time being, our family is complete.

It would not be right to let this day pass without acknowledging the moms who have helped to shape my life and make me into the mom that I am today:

My mother. Thank you, mom, for sharing your life and love with me. Thank you for caring for me, teaching me, listening to me, advising me, having pride in me, and being a friend to me. Thank you for your strength and determination that continues to win against a disease that has been trying to steal you away from us for over five years. You make me want to be a better person and live my life to the fullest every day.

My mother-in-law. Thank you, mom-in-law, for teaching my husband what it is to love his family and to prioritize them over everything else in life. Thank you for teaching him strength and courage, and giving him the support that has enabled his success.

My mom-friends. Thank you for being there and supporting me. Thank you for helping me through the rollercoasters of infertility and adoption (wherever each of you has entered my life, I know there has been a rollercoaster of some type!). Thank you for understanding and sharing my pain as well as my joy. Thank you for sharing your experiences and your lives. Thank you for making me laugh. I only hope that I can give you the support, comfort, and happiness that you have given me.

And, last, but certainly not least: I thank two young women that I have never met or spoken to. Two women from Kolkata, India who have given me the greatest gift on earth. These women, unable to care for the babies they had just given birth to, made a positive plan for the children’s lives by relinquishing them for adoption. These women decided to give the children life and hope. In taking this step, these women gave me my family. My daughters. My chance to be.. MOTHER. For this incredible gift, they deserve much more than a simple ‘thank you’. I hope and pray that they have peace in their lives and know in their hearts that their girls are loved as much as any child could possibly be loved. I might not know these women, but I will never forget who they are or what they have done for me and for my daughters.

Every day I am thankful that I have been blessed with my two amazing little girls. I am constantly surprised by the amount of love which seems to continue to grow between all of us. I cannot imagine today that I could love my children any more than I do at this moment, but I am finding that being a mother means that your heart grows and grows .. as does the amount of love that you can feel, give, and receive.

I am truly, truly blessed.

No Spicies!

2009-04-09T20:29:00.004-07:00

{scene: mexican restaurant, early this evening}
Dad: Maya, would you like another bite of my burrito?
Maya (loudly and dramatically, as she pitches herself backward onto the booth seat as if shot): Nooo! THIS Indian doesn't like SPICIES or MUSHROOMS!

So, prior to our Mexican restaurant outing (where Maya ate fish sticks and fries btw.. nothing spicey or mushroom-y).. we took Devika to a post-adoption medical and developmental evaluation at the International Adoption Clinic which is located in a nearby children's hospital.
First of all, let me say that it was a GREAT experience. There were six (or 7?) doctors/therapists who evaluated her.. held a quick meeting together.. and then presented their results to us. They were all very good.. Devika had a great time charming everyone that she met! They worked well with her and there were no meltdowns of any kind.
The most interesting results: all of the med personnel believe that she has a vision issue. We had never really thought anything of her eyes. We have noted that, at times, they don't look like they are aligned.. but it has seemed to be a rare occurrence and not something we were sure enough to even discuss with each other (and I mean Aj and I of course). The signs that lead to this: they noted that during certain exercises, her eyes looked to not be 100% aligned; she had problems putting a peg in a hole; she had problems putting small blocks in a cup; she tried to grab items off the floor occasionally and missed; she 'rakes' rather than grasps with a pincher-grasp; and most importantly: she walks into things and hits her head CONSTANTLY. We had attributed this to just a 'learning to walk' issue.. but it did seem fairly obvious by the end of our visit that it is not normal. We spent ~2 hrs in the same small exam room and she hit her head on EVERYTHING possible - more than once. Each time she hit her head, everyone seemed more and more certain that there is some type of vision issue. Of course, we don't know.. we had to make an appmt with an ophthalmologist and wait to find out.
She also 'tested' developmentaly with most motor skills at a 15-month level. With a few gross skills she is more like 18 months, with a few fine motor skills she is at 9-10 months, but overall they felt she was at 15 months. We were not surprised or overly concerned by this. We were happy to find out that she will qualify for OT (occupational therapy) for the fine motor skills.. and possibly for gross. We are going to be making some calls to get started on this also. They do feel like if she has a vision issue, it is the main contributor to the delays.
One other wierd thing .. she has a split uvula. Now my question is.. why has her pediatrician not noticed this? Odd eh? The doctor at the clinic told us that sometimes this is a sign of a type of cleft palate issue.. but the main sign of this would be an odd voice (did he say froggy? I cannot recall). He did not hear anything worrisome from Devi's voice. I also looked this up in Wikipedia - just to check the spelling of 'uvula' actually.. and this is interesting (keep in mind that she continually has ear infections):

A bifid uvula is a split or cleft uvula. Newborns with cleft palate also have a split uvula. The bifid uvula results from failure of complete fusion of the medial nasal and maxillary processes. Bifid uvulas have less muscle in them than a normal uvula, this may cause recurring problems with middle ear infections. While swallowing, the soft palate is pushed backwards. This prevents food and drink from entering the nasal cavity; if the soft palate cannot touch the back of the throat while swallowing, food and drink can enter the nasal cavity. Splitting of the uvula occurs infrequently but is the most common form of mouth and nose area cleavage among newborns (roughly 2% of infants have this bifid or split uvula). Bifid uvula occurs in about 1% of Caucasians and 10% of Native Americans.

Statistics have been presented in the New England Journal of Medicine suggesting a correlation between bifid uvula and aortic aneurysm.

Oh how I love reading medical items online. Don't they ALWAYS include some lovely note.. OH and btw.. there MAY be a correlation b/t this seemingly non-concerning issue and a life-threatening aortic aneurysm. {eye roll} I did think it was pretty cool that the doctor quoted his statistics correctly. When he saw the uvula and told us about it, he pretty much quoted the last 2 lines of the main paragraph (with numbers). Maybe he wrote this wikipedia entry.

Btw.. a couple other small items that came out of this meeting: we set up an evaluation for Maya (early June) due to our slight worries about her gross motor skills and some behavioral issues (we talked about most of this during todays meeting and they thought it would be a good idea). We also found out that Devi's screaming tantrums (our reason for scheduling this evaluation really) were normal. They saw many great signs of good attachment with us.. and they do see her always turning to 'mommy' for reassurance and care.. so they suggested some things that dad can do to try to boost his place in her priorities. They also agreed that we should pick her up and care for her needs/concerns when she screams as she is basically at 15-month level. She is too young for any type of 'manipulation'.. too young and very developmentally lacking at cognitive skills. They felt that if we did any type of damage by 'picking her up too much' or 'being too attentive'.. it would be very much the lesser of two evils (much more damaging to do the opposite). They were more concerned by the effects of my having to give this attention while Maya is needing my attention also. They gave some ideas to help this and want to check on Maya in June to ensure we aren't scarring her. ;) Ok, they didn't SAY that.. but they did warn me to be very careful and mentioned that we will revisit this in June.

Who's On First?

2009-03-29T19:35:00.003-07:00

I love my girls. They are constant, never-ending entertainment. Here are some examples from the past few days:

{Driving Maya home from pre-school}
Maya: Hey mommy, did Devika go to school today?
Me: Devi doesn't go to a real school like YOU do, but she had a class today.
Maya: Where is her class - is it at My Gym?
Me: Yes it is.
Maya: It is what?
Me: It is at My Gym.
Maya: It is at Your Gym?
Me: No, it isn't Mommy's gym..
Maya: MY Gym, not YOUR Gym?
Me: No, it is at 'My Gym'. The name of the class is 'My Gym'.
Maya: Oh, so it's YOUR gym, not MY gym.
Me: No, it is called MY GYM. Not YOUR gym.
Maya: So it's MY gym? NOT YOUR gym?
Me: MY GYM. MY GYM.
Maya: YOUR GYM. YOUR GYM.
Me: Ok, fine. Your Gym.
Maya: MY Gym??
Me: Yes.
{sigh}

Mommy-EMT.
I think that I might need highlights again. I think that several hairs on my head turned gray yesterday afternoon.
Maya was playing with a Playmobile toy that went with her 'castle' sets. I had, just the night before, ransacked the entire set of toys and bagged up all small pieces that I was afraid Devika would get into and potentially swallow or choke on.
Little did I know.. that only hours later, my 3 1/2 year old would choke on a piece that looked much to large to easily fit into a mouth or cause any issue. Maya stuck a circular 'water fountain' into her mouth - it had to be 3" in diameter.. and it somehow became lodged inside and somehow suctioned itself in so that she could not breathe. I looked down at her and she suddenly was making a fish-type of face and panicing.. so I just shoved my fingers into her mouth and somehow dislodged and removed it. It was definately suctioned in and not as easy as that just sounded. Her panicked breathing must have pulled it back as far as it would possibly go in her mouth and it had sealed off the opening to her throat.
ARRRRRRRRGH. Now I have made yet another run thru the house and removed even more small toys. Good grief. Thank GOD she did not do that when she was in another room and out of my sight for any short length of time. I guess this is why these kids are NEVER out of my sight for more than a minute or two. As annoying as that gets some days .. this is why I always have an ear tuned to them and an eye on them.
It was a lesson-learned. Poor thing was terrified (as was I).

In less traumatic news, Devi seems to have made some big leaps in the past few weeks regarding speech and communication. She understands almost everything we say to her. We can ask her to do something - 'put the cup in the cup drawer', 'put the ball in the toy room', etc.. and she does it! She is trying to say more words, though no one but mommy can likely understand them! She clearly says 'Mama', 'Dada', 'Baby', 'Bye-Bye'.. and she somewhat-coherently says 'Night-night', 'Dog', 'Woof', 'Ball', 'No', 'Good Girl', 'Maya'. She tries to repeat words quite often - especially things she hears a lot, such as dog commands, etc. She signs 'eat', 'cracker', 'more' on a regular basis.
She also throws huge dramatic fits on a regular basis! I hope this is due to a communication issue and will resolve itself over time. At least a bit. Criminy. Drama queen for sure. Don't dare to tell this child 'No!' without a mega-meltdown. Such a difference from Maya! It's amazing how different two kids can be.
She can definitely hold her own with Maya though. There are a LOT of sibling skirmishes, as to be expected. Devi is starting to enjoy hitting her sister.. and Maya has no problems smacking her back. Luckily Maya doesn't throw the first hit very often - she just 'accidentally' bumps into Devi and knocks her down and then 'accidentally' sits on her. Well.. Devi is catching up in size .. and at some point is going to be bigger than Maya. Devi isn't built 'skinny-minny' like Maya.. she is muscular. The girl (Maya) better watch it or she is in trouble in a few years! I'd say they are pretty equal at starting the little fights though.. so life is very loud at our house these days.
Devi is also into screaming her head off for anything right now. Happy, sad, angry, hungry.. just belts out the most god-awful screams you have ever heard. I think she sounds like a baby Tyrannosaurus-Rex, so while Aj calls her 'Screamika', I nicknamed her 'Baby T-Rex'. I keep reminding her that we are not dinasours, but she isn't listening.

Be The Answer

2009-03-23T13:51:00.008-07:00

Thanks everyone for the prayers and kind words/thoughts regarding my mom. It's been pretty crazy lately.. she has scared us a few times. She is really not doing very well right now.. she is fighting pain and nausea.. and trying to figure out a pain-killer dosage that doesn't cause her to literally fall over. She HAS fallen a few times, and has hurt her hip and banged her head. The drugs cause her to be somewhat incoherent. Luckily she has hours during the day lately where she is lo-dose and is 'mom' again. I hope these hours get longer and she rallies back into feeling somewhat human for at least awhile. I feel so sorry for her. I traveled to visit and help out a couple weeks ago, and I'm getting ready to return again. One of my sisters is staying with my parents and helping out.. she needs a break. I'm heading home again on April 3rd for a week. It's tough work - having to sleep with one eye open basically so that you know if she is wandering out of bed in the middle of the night and falling down.
I think the worst part now is that she knows that treatment had to be stopped, and the cancer is probably running rampant. She gets very depressed on occasion - partly from the prognosis and pain.. and partly b/c she hates having a lack of control. It isn't easy for a parent to let their children help so much - or at least in my family it is this way. My dad is having a horrible time dealing with our help. He is worse than mom with the control issues these days.. and it is so difficult on everyone. If we try to do anything to help, we get to hear 'I don't need anyone making decisions for me.. My kids don't need to run my life..' blahblahblah. Of course I completely understand. If my soulmate was going thru this, I don't know that I could even get out of bed and function every day. I just wish that there was more peace.
Keep the prayers coming.. she needs every single one of them.
In other news, I finished the membership film that I was creating for the Joint Council on International Children's Services. Here it is.. check it out!

I Need a Spa Day

2009-03-04T21:34:00.004-07:00

I haven't had much time or inclination to blog lately.. but here I am. The past couple of weeks have been painful - ear pain and heart pain.

Life has been quite stressful lately. For one thing, Devika has been having adjustment/attachment issues. She has been screaming her head off if I am not holding her - ALL the time. Even if I go to the bathroom and take her in with me - she flips out when I set her down. Not only does she scream, but she throws her head and body backward at full speed.. and flails all over. It is crazy and horrible and I'm always afraid she will seriously hurt herself. Nothing will stop it, other than my picking her up. Aj and I have disagreed a bit on how to handle this - he didn't think it truly was an attachment issue. I talked with our agency rep, who happens to also be a good friend of mine, and she gave me very good tips on how to handle it as an attachment issue. The more I spoke to her about everything that has been happening (including sleep issues, eye-contact issues, terror of music and other non-every-day sounds).. it became very obvious to me that it is attachment/adjustment related. I've already begun following some of her advice (as has Aj - he just needed more 'technical' explanation to understand what was going on).. and I'm seeing a slight difference already. I hope it continues to improve, and I think that it will. Criminy.. it has been a painful 2 1/2 weeks of screaming fits.
Ajay has nicknamed her 'Screamika'. Fitting eh? :)
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I've also been a bit down recently because of my mom's failing health.
She has been so very sick this past month. I guess we were a bit 'spoiled' by her sickness in the past. She has had some bad chemo side effects, etc.. but nothing completely devastating. Or at least, looking back, they weren't devastating - just unknown and scary. Now she is actually not able to motivate herself to eat or drink.. she keeps getting dehydrated and needing an IV hydration. She has lost sooo much weight.. she is very very underweight now. She is on pain killers for her side pain, and they are making her incredibly loopy due to the fact that she isn't eating/drinking. She was taken off the chemo a couple of wks ago and the oncologist told us last week that basically she is at the end of the road re. treatment. Her treatment has caused blood counts to plummet, vomiting that responds to no drugs, etc.
Quite devastating news, even tho we all saw it creeping up on us.. we just do what every other cancer victim's loved ones do in this scenerio: we deny that it will happen in OUR case - surely there will be a miracle of some sort - or at least a couple more years of very slow disease movement so that we have more time.
TIME. Where the hell does it go.
Anyhow.. her oncologist is now talking about potentially putting her back on the chemo.. but I don't really understand what is going on. I think maybe I will try to join her at her appmt on Monday and fill in the blanks. It's hard being a few states away and trying to decipher all of the information and updates. The chemo has basically been killing her - she became nauseous and this led to the decline (no food/water/dehydrated - led to very low blood counts, etc). We hope that her 'loopiness' is due to the pain killers, but I keep hearing about the onc. wanting to do a PET or CT scan on Friday to check some 'spots' that, to this point, had not been growing. These spots are on her liver and brain. Yikes. Very scary stuff.
Ok.. that's all the update I need to spew out right now. Just scary to be so far away when she is in such a 'touchy' situation. She has been very unstable the past month. I'm flying in to see her and help her and dad out on Sunday - staying thru Thursday.
I hate this hideous nasty disease. Leaves you feeling so powerless. For a person who likes constant control, this is almost unbearable. Thank god I have some distractions. I mentioned that I'm training for the Tri For The Cure Triathlon which is coming up in August. I'm still working my butt off - I started week 6 of training today. Whoohoo! I actually ran 20! straight minutes a couple of days ago. This week it raises to 25.. yikes. Hope I can do it. Every time I start to struggle mentally with the running, I just think of all the crap that my mom is dealing with.. and how she sure as hell would love to be in physical condition to do this.. so I press on for her. I hope I can raise some money with my fundraising for this triathlon.
I've also decided to join the Komen 3-day 60 mile walk. Only issue is that Ajay would like to do it with me and we need to have someone here with the girls. Maybe the in-laws could make a visit.. or maybe one of my friends who is reading this would like to join me? Would rock if we could get a little team together. Come on - you can do it!! I think that my siblings should at least join me.. anyone? anyone? Bueller? Not sure how many people I could talk into training to walk 60 miles.. the couple of people I've mentioned it to have looked at me like I just landed in a space ship. It is SO inspiring though. If you can't join, I hope that maybe you will make a donation when I get my fund raising page online.
Please watch this video if you have not heard of this awesome event:

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I'm glad to have these goals, as they give me a teeny feeling of control and empowerment - like maybe I'm doing something that will benefit someone in the future who has to deal with this disease. I would not want to see any of my sisters or my girls having to fight this.

Ok, enough of that.

So Maya was on a roll yesterday with some funny remarks! I had to jot them down.. they brightened my day so very much. :)

Regarding chocolate cereal straws, which are currently her fav food item (and unfortunately she often eats them in our bed while watching cartoons at 6 am every day.. they leave hideous amounts of crumbs): "I am not an addict.. I'm a tattle-tail!" ? Obviously she has been tattling at pre-school??
While wearing her over=sized butterfly towel-robe after her bath - she began running around the house yelling: "Booo! I'm a ghost who needs underpants!"
Before school, upon walking outside and lifting her face and arms to the sky: "It's such a beautiful morning! The birds are flying, the sun is chirping..!"
It was chilly this morning and my arms had goose-bumps. Maya said, in alarm, "MOMMY! Your skin is standing up!!"

Feeling Like A True Parent

2009-02-16T20:05:00.004-07:00

Thanks to everyone for the well-wishes for Maya! She was such a big girl on Friday! She had a 2-hr wait before they brought her into the operating room.. and then they forgot to give her the little 'chill' drug before taking her in.. so I was very proud that she did not freak out. When she was lying on the table, they tried to put the 'strawberry air' on her, and then she got scared. She refused to let them do it for a minute.. but then the anesthesiologist and the nurse started singing 'Mary Had a Little Lamb'.. and she was somewhat intrigued. After a couple of seconds, she started licking at the air inside the mask! It was so funny. :) She passed out and mommy went to the waiting room.
Dad had to leave and take Devi to the pediatrician - somehow we scheduled that appmt and then completely forgot (oh what a shock - not!). I sat and waited.. and after ~1 1/2 hrs, the dentist and then the anesthesiologist came out to tell me that she did great. They ended up having to fix 6 teeth instead of 4.. and they are worried that they still won't hold up until she loses them for permanent teeth. But we will probably have to do several cleaning visits/year plus special toothpaste. Blah.
Soon after the docs came out to talk to me, the recovery nurses called me into the recovery room. Seems that our little Maya was flipping out! She came out of the anesthesia in a panic and was throwing a big fit. I helped them restrain her and take her from the recovery room into the post-surgery room. She was FREAKING out. Much as I luv the Children's Hospital, I was a little surprised that the nurses did not help me. Poor Maya was thrashing around and literally screaming as loud as she could 'GET AWAY FROM MEEEEEEEEEEE! I WANT TO LEAVE!' and then just scream-screams. She was hitting me as hard as she could (no idea how I did not leave there with a black eye) and kicking me. The tubes (IV, finger monitor) were getting all wrapped around her. The heartbeat monitor kept going up to 170 and beeping like a maniac. Meanwhile, I was trying to talk her down and hold her down so she did not fall out of the bed and hurt herself/pull out the iv/etc. Finally I decided to just pick her up and hold her b/c I thought I might be able to restrain her a little better.. and that did work. For the first 5 min or so (this was about 15 minutes into the recovery craziness), she screamed and tried to beat the heck out of me (including head-butting, which was lovely). Finally she slowly calmed down.. and eventually I was able to sit in the rocking chair and rock her to sleep. My GOD! The nurses who came in to check the beeping monitor said 'oh this happens.. it's normal.. '.. but it would have been very nice had someone forewarned me that this could happen. I didn't expect her to wake up happy - but this was a child who was NOT my child.. if you know what I mean. A bit scary. I knew it was the drugs, but it felt like it took forever to calm her down and nothing I could say or do was helping. I wish they had told me to hold her immediately, because that probably would have been the best thing to do. In retrospect, I can't believe that I didn't just DO that.. but when you are 'fighting a fire' so to speak.. I guess you are reactionary and you don't always think logically. Poor little baby!!
Wierd thing is.. she remembers this! I thought for sure the drugs would make her forget. I have asked her 'do you remember hitting mommy and yelling after your surgery?' and she gets a sheepish look and says 'yeeeeesss..' and giggles. Another funny thing is that I heard her singing 'Mary Had a Little Lamb' in her toyroom earlier today - and she never has ever sung that song! Both verses even (they sung both verses as she passed out). So isn't that funny?
But - she was fine.. and her mouth hurt for ~1 1/2 days, but everything feels good now. I hope that the teeth hold out and we don't have to deal with any more of that! Not looking forward to Devika's teeth issues.. hope this doesn't happen. They have warned that it looks the same. Blaaaaah.
Of course, it is these times that really make you feel like a parent right? Those poor little girls! Maya was post-recovery and Devika was post-5-shots from the pediatrician. :(( Our house was not a happy one this weekend! Maya is still not completely recovered from the trauma - she is sleeping in my bed as I type this! But oh my gosh, your heart just could burst from wanting to snuggle them after seeing the sick kids in that hospital. I want to hug my girls and never let go!!!

Btw - for those of you who have contacted me to let me know you would like to contribute photos - I will email you tomorrow w/my personal email address. Thx in advance!

Maya loves being a big-sister!

Happy {early} Valentine's Day!

2009-02-12T19:48:00.002-07:00

Maya was quite excited by the valentines she rec'd in the mail today. A Tinkerbell 'love day card' from grandma and papa.. and a Thomas the Train 'love day card' from her cousin Andrew, and the rest of his family. It was pretty cool that her valentine matched the new jammies that we bought her for her hospital day tomorrow!
Happy Love Day everyone!

Just In Time For Love Day

2009-02-11T22:55:00.005-07:00

Our sweet little girl.. Daddy's innocent little baby.. experienced her FIRST KISS! Haahaa.. Age 3.. starting pretty young. I almost forgot to document this event, and I will definitely want to remind her of THIS in the future!
Date: Super Bowl Sunday - February 1st, 2009.
Boy: Sawyer H - friend/neighbor. Age 2 1/2.
It was soo cute! Not sure what was up with that boy, but when we first arrived to hang out and watch the game, he was telling Maya how much he liked her. A couple hours later, I catch him standing up on his tip-toes (he is a bit shorter than she is and has the cutest spikey hair) and planting a big smooch right on her mouth! She was watching him as he stood staring at her and then reached up for the big 'moment' - standing still with her hands clasped behind her back and her head tilted in confused-curious-amusement.
What is this kid doing? Why did all the grown-ups in the room suddenly stop all conversation and stare, startled, at us? Why are all the women saying 'ooooh, how cuuuuute!', and why is Daddy running towards us with his brow furled and saying 'hey! if your son touches my daughter again, he is going to be in BIG TROUBLE!' (and then something about body parts that I don't understand..)

Ah, the memories!

Yesterday, we visited the Children's Hospital for Maya's pre-surgery tour. A child-life specialist walked us (and one other family) through the process we will go thru on Friday - all the rooms and all the steps involved. It was great! I'm so glad that we did this. I think it will help Maya to not be quite so scared - tho I'm sure she will get freaked out at some point (psh, who wouldn't?). She wouldn't try the little 'lighted band-aid' on her finger (that measures heartbeat, etc) - tho Mommy and Daddy both tried it and showed her how painless and fun it would be.
She was very cute though - she asked lots of questions (constantly entertaining everyone in the area), she tried everything else (blood pressure, breathing into the strawberry-scented mask, sitting up on the operating table, taking the IV out of the doll's arm). She is very much looking forward to Friday so that she can wear the 'hospital jammies' and play with the toys in the 'toy corner' of the procedure area. Unfortunately, they walked us thru the very cool and much larger toy room of the major surgery area before walking thru the area she would be hanging out in.. and she thinks that she will be playing with those toys. yikes. Bad move really. Hopefully she is just too tired to care, as we will be there at 6:30 am.
I bought her a new pair of Thomas the Train jammies for the day.. as well as a Thomas toy to play with when she returns home. I hope she isn't too freaked out! If she is, they might have to give Mommy a sniff of the strawberry air also! :D

On a different subject - I am creating a film for the Joint Council for Int'l Childrens Services. I am in need of more photos of adoptive families/kids. If any of you adoptive-family readers are interested in sending me a photo or two, please contact me. I will require that you sign a release form (standard practice). Not sure exactly what photos I will need, as I have not begun working on the film yet.. but if you have a couple of favorites (from picking child up/orphanage/etc or child with your fam at home).. please let me know! Comment with your email address - or msg me on Facebook. Thanks in advance!

10 Years - OMG!

2009-02-05T22:59:00.004-07:00

Today is a special day!

Today is the 10 year anniversary of the fateful day that I met my husband! To honor this decade.. and him.. I am dedicating this blog post to him. No groaning please.. he deserves it! I occasionally hear that I am not the best person at ‘positive feedback’ when it comes to some of the people who are closest to me {ok, ok, I can be horrible about it at times.. but I am really trying to work on that.. and I’m not including my kids in this comment b/c I work my butt off to always ‘feed the meter’ with them. I just need to remember that adults need this also!!}

So.. in the spirit of those stupid ’25 things about me’ lists going around Facebook these days (yes, I’m working on mine but it isn’t done yet.. haha):

25 Things That I Love About My Husband

10 years! My longest relationship with a man prior to my husband was 3 years (and included a marriage.. ah the mistakes of our youth.. sigh). It feels like I have known Aj forever.. but then ’10 years’ sounds like an eternity.. I feel stuck in some type of paradox here. I have to say, however, that HE probably feels like these 10 years HAVE been an eternity.. haha! I’m not the easiest person to live with, but for some reason he tells me that I’m the best thing that ever happened to him. Another paradox.. I love that he loves me.
I am so proud of him! He is very successful. He has succeeded at work, with his ‘moonlight’ work (real estate – and it is successful, even if we get sued every freaking year by some idiot or have to sue some idiot for doing something idiotic every year. Should they be called ‘rental’ properties? Maybe ‘suck the life out of you’ properties would be more representative.), with his coaching (past soccer teams, work teams, etc), with his friendships, and with his family.
We both had the same favorite movie when we met (and still do): It’s a Wonderful Life. {No one is a failure who has friends.}
We have had artists ask to paint our portrait because our coloring and facial structures blend and contrast in a way that would create a striking image. I’m quoting here.. and I hope that it was complimentary and not a ‘Dali-esque’ style of painting they were referring to!
Before I met Aj, I had only traveled to a few states within the US, and only been on a plane a handful of times. I HATED to fly (still do not enjoy it – scares the heck out of me and requires the ingestion of several xanax).. but somehow this man has managed to show me the world! In the past ten years, we have flown to Brazil, New Zealand, Australia, MexicoHawaii (ok, a state.. but it was a looong flight!), Puerto Rico, Jamaica, Saint Martin, India (twice to adopt our kids), as well as several states on the east coast, west coast, and interior of the US. There are many more countries that we have on our ‘travel list’, but they have to wait until the girls are a couple years older and better travelers. (many, many times),
I love that Aj is super-intense, but has a very sweet, soft side. {oh crap, I am not supposed to tell anyone that..}
I hate that he had to deal with 55 hours of thinking that I had a very short time to live - because of a large tumor that was found in my colon. I love that the doctors were wrong and it was NOT cancer. I love that he took such amazing care of me during the recovery from that scary major surgery and the following scary complications.
I love that he manages most of our finances, because I hate that part of life. I love that, while he manages our finances, he reviews everything with me so that he is sure I know everything that is going on at all times. I might act annoyed when he is digging thru financial details, but I appreciate this so very much.
I love that he loves to learn and he tries so very hard to teach me things – especially things about history and sci-fi. History (not all, of course) bores me, but I wish I could be more interested and remember a zillion little facts and dates like he does. I wish I could have conversations with people and spout these facts off to support my viewpoints and ideas.
I love that he is very smart, but I feel that we are equals. We are smart about different things and we complement each other (usually, anyhow!). For example, I am much more technically-adept than he. If I ever die, someone needs to program his alarm clock for him (and the tv.. and the remotes.. and..)
I love that I met him 10 years ago at a party.. I left the party to go to a bar (the party was horrid and I was there with a girl friend who wanted to go find some fun).. and he found a way to leave his best friend’s party and follow me there.
I love that he tells the story of our meeting.. and how he knew that I was ‘the one’ when I bought him a beer at the bar. I love that he conveniently forgets that I bought six different people beers at that same time. J
I love that we made complete fools of ourselves that first night – dancing up on some podium-thing. I had never done that before that night.. nor ever after! Of course, the fact that we were slightly (slightly?) intoxicated and doing a little dirty-dancing really added to the memories (yikes).
I love that I could not remember how to pronounce his name the following Monday at work (party was on a Friday). His friend – the party thrower, whom I worked on the same floor as, laughed at me when I came up to him at least 5x that day with Aj’s biz card to ask ‘Now.. how do you pronounce his name again??’ {..a bird.. a jay..}
I love that Aj gave me his biz card that night and wrote down SIX different phone numbers where I could reach him. And that I didn’t use any of them. I do not call the guy the first time – he calls me!! I think that led to some type of email fiasco – b/c his friend thought my last name was ‘Zimmerman’. It was not.
10 years ago tonite, I first heard the words ‘In my country – you would be queen!’. Funny that I just heard him utter those same words to a male friend on super bowl Sunday! Of course, when he said them to me – he was trying to entrance me with his sense of humor so that I would come up to his ‘hot tub on the roof’. Nice try Aj.
I LOVE that the night Aj and I had met – he was leaving the next week to finish his move to LA. He had already moved all of his personal items out to his house on Redondo Beach. Needless to say, he did not finish his move.. and ended up moving back to Cincinnati (a city he hated) to be with me.
I love that we both have the same dream of owning a house in New Zealand and splitting our time b/t that house and our house in CO.. someday not too far in the future we hope.
I love that Aj is so very supportive of me, and my pursuing my dreams.
I love that Aj is such a great dad to his girls (including our lab, Tasha).
I find it hilarious that Aj tried to ‘save face’ and keep up with my brother-in-law, Charlie, when drinking at a bar very soon after meeting. Had I known he was doing this, I would have stopped him immediately. It takes a special type of person to be able to keep up with this boy (or anyone in his family!).. and Aj is much, much too much of a lightweight! Yes boys and girls.. it was ugly.
I loved that, on our 2^nd ‘real date’ (I don’t include this meeting night as a ‘date’ – our first ‘date’ was valentines day) – we went to The Teak in Cincinnati and ate Thai food. The poor boy was sweating profusely b/c they made his food much hotter than he had ordered. He was sooo embarrassed.
I love that, for our first ‘real’ date, I drove to Indianapolis, where he was working, and met him for dinner. Our first non-intoxicated kiss (I just can’t count that) was in a glass elevator. I was quite embarrassed. He, unfortunately, was not.
I love his family and their culture. I love that I have learned what it is to HAVE a culture. Though it has made things challenging for us a few times in our relationship, his culture is an integral part of our lives and something that I am envious not to have grown up with.
I love that we had discussed adopting girls from India prior to our marriage and prior to finding out that we could not have bio children. I find it a bit coincidental, looking back, that we had these conversations and were both on the same page. I love that we have worked together to adopt two beautiful little girls from India, and that they have their daddy and his family to teach them about their heritage. I love that we are a family.

25.5 I love that I could continue this list, but have run out of my 25 numbers. :)

A Little News

2009-02-03T21:24:00.003-07:00

Ok.. everyone out there who has known me for any extended period of time.. please do not laugh so hard that you roll out of your chair, fall over something sharp and find yourself with serious head trauma.. or laugh so hard that you pass out from lack of sufficient oxygen levels:
I am officially... {insert drum roll} .. in-training!
I am training for a triathlon (sprint triathlon, not a big one!). I was somehow talked into this by a friend of mine recently. She is a non-athletic, anti-workout type person also.. and thought that I would be a perfect buddy for her. How she came up with this, I have no idea. Seriously. ME??? But hey - here I am 1 1/2 wks later - already having registered and paid my $100+ (non-refundable I might add).. and having completed all of 'week 1' plus 2 workouts of 'week 2' of the 'Couch to 5k' running program.
CRAZY!
The triathlon that we are entering into is the Tri For The Cure, which is being held in early August.
See? She also hit me with a cause that I am very serious about.. and at a time that my mom is seriously battling for her life against this hideous disease. What could I say?
So I'm into the 2nd week of working out. It hasn't been too painful so far.. but I'm not into mega-workouts yet. I balanced the chemicals in the pool today and made sure it is turned up and ready for me to use. I guess I need to start working on my swim skills and endurance. I don't OWN a bike, so that is going to be a bit of a challenge. I don't have the money to throw into a nice pricey bike right now, so I'm going to start looking at the used bike stores in the area. I have no idea what to even look for.. so I hope someone there can help me. Or maybe I should do some research/visit a retail store to gain some knowledge.
Yes, I am insane.
Yes, I do need this motivation to get myself moving.. and I'm very excited that I at least will be getting into shape! Hopefully I live to tell about it.. ;)

In other news, my mom is quite sick right now. Last week was probably her worst week EVER. She got more and more sick.. and by the weekend she was vomiting/keeping down no food or drink/dehydrated/in hideous pain. The core of her issue is the left side pain. The doctors can't find anything actually causing it, so they are now assuming it is the cancer in her spine/hip bones. Her last PET scan (was that 2 wks ago now?) - showed no new cancer in any organs, but the bone cancer is still charging right along. They put her on a new chemo and also a chemo pill. She's getting slammed.
She got so sick last week (she lost 8!! lbs b/t Thursday and Sunday!) that her doctor put her in the hospital yesterday. THANK GOD!! She needed it. She's still vomiting and feeling horrible, but the side pain was alleviated first by the morphine and now the oxycontin. They are going to put her on a strict pain-control regimen when she gets out. It will require that she SLEEPS (she never sleeps) and eats right. They are also doing some radiation on the part of the spine that they think could be causing this. Radiation is a last-ditch effort, which.. well.. which sucks. They can only radiate so much, and they won't do it until they HAVE to do it. Now they have to do it. Not sure what this will mean in the future, but whatever. She has to have pain relief, so I guess we're to that point.
Soo.. if you are the praying type.. please add her to your prayers. Her name is Ruth Morgan. She needs all the prayers she can get. She needs a lot of strength to get through this.
I'm trying to find a way to get back to IN in order to help out my mom and dad.. but no way to do it right now. Hubby has to travel for work later this week and part of next week.. Maya has oral surgery next week.. the girls have colds, so they couldn't be around my mom.. blahblahblah. But if I need to get there, I'll do it. I have a couple of friends/relatives who have offered to help with the girls, so that is always a possibility in an emergency. Hopefully there will be no emergencies. I was just hoping to get home to help with the house/laundry/food.

That's all the exciting news I have today. I spent this evening having a pretend picnic in the living room with Maya and several of her not-present school friends. It was so cute - she was very particular about the food we were eating, the utensils that she handed out, and saying grace several times throughout the picnic meal (of course there was no real food/utensils/etc)! She then spent the rest of the evening playing 'my bear is so sick and in the hospital and I have to take care of him'. :D

Catch Up!

2009-01-31T22:46:00.004-07:00

I've been reminded a few times lately that my blog has been, and I quote, '..quite boring' lately. Alas, life has caught up with me a bit and I haven't been taking the time to blog. My apologies.
I'm attaching some photos and video to catch you up a bit on the past couple of weeks! Here is a quick update:
* Devika did very well with her cast, other than kicking us all the time and inflicting injury to our bodies. She finally was able to have the cast removed yesterday, and she was SO very excited! There is a photo in the slideshow, if you can see it very well, that shows her ecstatic expression. It was hilarious! She has been running and climbing like an animal ever since.
* Both girls have had colds this week. Devi's is, of course, now an ear and sinus infection. Poor kiddo! Always on some type of medication. Maya doesn't seem to be getting worse, so hopefully we will go without a pediatrician trip for her this time.
* Devika had an allergist appmt a couple of wks ago. Turns out she is allergic to peanuts and tree nuts. Yikes! We went to the allergist regarding her milk and egg issues.. and it turned out to be a simple protein processing issue and not an allergy. In fact, she had a hideous 'blow out' approximately 2 minutes after the skin test was administered. The doctor was amazed, as this was the first time a patient has ever had a systemic reaction to a skin test that she has administered. Go figure!
The good thing is that it is caused by her colon not being developed 100% (possibly due to prematurity), and she should grow out of this issue within the next 3-5 years. I sure hope so!! She has major reactions to anything that has milk in the first 6 or 7 listed ingredients. It is ridiculous.
* My mom has been quite sick lately, in a tough fight against pain caused by either the cancer or her treatments. She has horrid pain in her left side, and they can't find anything wrong. This is the worst I've seen her (well, I can't see her from here.. but I hear from my siblings).. and the first time she is admitting to really feeling horrible. She has lost weight and is not able to go out and do anything. We're all praying that this pain gets resolved soon so that her quality of life can improve. Please pray with us!! I wish I could go visit and help her out, but it is very challenging when you have 2 little girls and your hubby travels. I'm trying to work something out very soon. Hopefully after Maya's oral surgery.
* Oh yeah, Maya has to have oral surgery to have her 4 back molars filled/sealed/whatever. The dentist warned us that her teeth were very porous from in-utero malnutrition, and here we are. Same with Devika's teeth - tho I hope she will seal them before they are decaying as badly as Maya's are. Arrggh. So Maya will have this done at Children's Hospital on the 13th. My poor baby! She will be so freaked out. The hospital has a 'pre-surgery' tour you can take with your child a few days prior, so I'm going to sign up for this. Maybe she will be more calm if we do this. She is not one for new experiences, that's for sure.
* We had our 2nd post-placement visit last week for Devika's adoption. Only one more to go.. things are in line for the legal adoption to happen in April (we hope). Yay! We actually spent more time worrying about Maya at this visit than Devi. Maya has some 'stranger' issues.. as in, she isn't scared of them - especially men - and has no prob going up to them in public places, etc. She def. bonds quickly with men vs women. I also see some bonding issues b/t her and her dad. Sooo.. we were advised to schedule her for an evaluation with the Int'l Adoption Clinic at Children's.. which does this type of evaluation, etc. I'm not super worried or anything, but our social worker thought that this might lead to more major issues in her teen years if we don't look into it now.
* Both of our girls are actually adjusting very well these days. Maya's behavior is soo much better. I believe she is pretty much 'normal' now.. whatever that means for a 3 yr old! She loves her sister and calls her 'my baby'. :) Devika also loves Maya, though she still enjoys alone time with me or with Daddy. She is such a very very happy baby! And very snuggly!! Maya was never a snuggly child, which was disappointing for us in the past. I don't know if it was an attachment issue or what (our social worker believes that it was.. in retrospect).. but it is an amazing difference to have a lovey child. Devi loves to snuggle into my neck when she is tired. She also loves to run at me and jump into my lap.. if she is ever sitting (and it only happens for very short periods of time!), this is her favorite spot.
Maya is doing well with helping with Devika, she is doing well at school, and she is becoming a bit more active (tho still won't go up or down stairs w/o holding onto something tightly or going down on her behind). Her behavior issues are improving - partly I believe b/c I'm using some new parenting methods. Need to change it up on occasion I guess. I'm now using some methods from 'The Happy Toddler' book by Harvey Karp MD. I'm working on myself to do more 'rewarding', and I've noticed improvements already. Yay!

So I know the girls have done and said soo many cute things lately, but I'm tired/sick (caught the cold today) and need to rest up for Super Bowl Sunday! Time to go to sleep. Hopefully I'll blog again in the next few days and catch up on some funny stories/cuteness that I don't want to forget!

Here's a little cuteness for today:

Lurch-ing??

2009-01-10T15:31:00.003-07:00

So, Aj thinks that Devika resembles Lurch when she walks with her cast. I don't see it..

A New Year, A New...

2009-01-07T21:17:00.005-07:00

Toy! Ahh.. I am typing today on my BRAND NEW desktop computer! I am so very, very excited!! A totally FAB way to start the new year! Not only was my last desktop on it's last leg (seriously - it took me 1 1/2 hrs just to upload a photo from a SD card the other day).. but this one is uber-fast (quad core - w00t!). It is so fast that I just want to do some work now! Bring on a slew of RAW images! Bring on a 30-minute custom video!! Hm. Too bad I'm taking some time off. Might have to allow myself the odd job here and there just to keep myself sane. (And really.. obviously my work isn't 'work'.. I LOVE it and I miss it)
Soo.. what's new in our little section of the world? Not terribly much, thank GOD. ;) Devika is dealing with her broken leg. She still cannot walk with the cast.. but it is SO heavy compared to her body weight, that I will be surprised if she ever is able to do so. I have seen her take 2-3 steps, however, so never say never.
She is staying happy.. but is very cranky by the end of the day and I think it might be bothering/hurting her. Of course, she is also cutting 2 teeth right now. I've noticed that after a little Motrin the past 2 evenings, her disposition has dramatically improved.
A New Year, A New..
Concern. I'm a bit worried about Devi's weight. Ok.. I'm quite worried about her weight. I decided to step on the scales with her today and see what she was up to. I"m thinking.. hm.. this cast is HEAVY.. I bet she's weighing in at 17 lbs with it. She was just under 15 lbs at her last weigh-in, just prior to our xmas travels. So we step on the scale.. then I step off, set her down, and re-weigh myself.. and.. uh oh. Only a 14 lb difference!!!!!! I re-weighed 4x to be sure it wasn't a weighing error.
Holy cow. That means that she is maybe down to 12 lbs?? The cast is heavy.. so I'm guessing 2 lbs. ARGH. I've really been trying to beef her up.. though maybe our traveling messed it up a bit - there were several days when we could not add in some margarine or oil to her meals or find her something super-fatty. We've been consistent with the 4 scoops of formula:6 oz water though.. but she only drinks maybe 10 oz per day. She just won't drink it later in the day.
Obviously I need to be more creative - push the formula into her and ensure super-fatty meals as often as possible thru-out the day. I try to do 6 small meals (b/c she doesn't eat much at each one). Remember she is lactose-intolerant.. so I have to find non-dairy fattening food. This is DIFFICULT. If anyone out there has any thoughts/advice for me, please please share. I've been looking online.. we've talked to a nutritionist.. no one has good ideas. I'm going to take her to an allergist to determine exactly what her food issues are.. maybe that will shed light on things that we can give to her. Scary. She also still fits perfectly in her size 6 month pants that were given to her upon her arrival home. :( She seems to like french fries, so I went to McD's a couple times this week to get her some. She only eats like 4 of them.. but I guess that might be a lot for someone her size. Poor little peanut!
A New Year, A New..
Attitude. Maya is doing well lately. She's better with Devika and not so 'treat me like a baby!'. Phew! I think all of the attention given to her over Xmas was very helpful to her. I was afraid she would backslide after returning home, but she has continued to be better-adjusted. She is doing better in school - participates much more than before and is more social.
Unfortunately, she does not EVER want to go to school in the mornings anymore.. so every morning has become a complete nightmare. At least she does well once she arrives and is basically pushed/carried/prodded/bribed into the classroom. This morning she laid down in the entry hall and refused to get up. Luckily a nice teacher came by and teased her about a hole sucking her into the carpet. She was confused and amused.. and got up and walked to her classroom. I guess I need to try to be a bit more 'light' and humorous. I'm getting too stressed by it, I'm sure. I'm just not used to having to do this - she was always great about going to school before Devika came home. Now I have an active baby in one arm (who can't grip me due to the cast), Maya's backpack in the other (she refuses to carry it b/c it's heavy with her boots inside), and have to use the rest of my energy to try to stay calm and upbeat in order to cajole her into school. Argh. Single moms - how DO they do it???
So that is Maya's newest 'thing'. We are pretty well past the hitting-phase.. and now we are in the 'throw our bodies on the ground and curl into a ball' phase. ARRRRRRRRRRRGH. EVERY time I ask her to do something.. even if she was in a nice, happy mode.. she will react this way. I think that the only way to deal with it is with humor. Not let it bother me. {on the outside!} I think I will put up a bunch of post-it notes tomorrow - all around my house: "MAKE A JOKE!" "LAUGH, DON"T GLARE!" "HAHAHAAHAAA!" "IGNORE AND MOVE ON!"
Maybe that will help. Maybe.
I've been taking toys away - the 'ole Love and Logic method. "Uh oh.. so sorry.. looks like Thomas is going away for a few days." She isn't phased by this strategy lately. She responds with "Take Barney too", or "I DON'T CARE! I DON'T WANT TOYS!"
She's going to be a joy when she is a teenager.
In the midst of all this new attitude she is sporting, she is also very entertaining in a good way. :) She loves to sing songs and perform (you've seen the videos!), she loves to drive her plasmacar around the house and make up stories about where she is going and what she is doing. She loves to help in the kitchen, she goes to bed immediately (usually.. though she still gets up pre-sun and kills my will to live), she is super-chatty and just hilarious, she constantly tells me how much she loves me and gives me hugs and kisses.
Tonite she was running around the house singing, 'Is you is or is you is my baaaaay-beeeeeeeee!'. {if you don't know, the words to the song are, "Is you is, or is you ain't my Baby.."}
3-yr olds.. must be the 'manic stage'. {Please don't tell me that it is always the manic-stage.. even if it is.. I don't need to know that yet!}

Unstoppable!

2009-01-02T18:42:00.003-07:00

Nothing stands in this girl's way! At least now she is sporting a fashionable walking cast. :)

Starting The Year Off On The Right Foot

2009-01-01T21:40:00.003-07:00

.. literally. Poor little Devika can't stand on her left foot b/c her left leg is broken! It would be great if the orthopedic doctor doesn't think she needs a cast (appmt tomorrow), but I would be surprised. She keeps trying to stand on her leg - she just cannot sit still. Poor little thing.. it must be so confusing to her!

Maya felt like singing today!

Bring On The New Year - PLEASE!!

2008-12-31T21:31:00.007-07:00

Trauma.
Yes, again today - we had a trauma. I think I might have mentioned in previous posts (several previous posts) that we can't seem to get through ONE week post-India without a visit to the pediatrician? or a doctor of some sort? Well.. today was our first of at least 2 doctor visits for this week.
Devika broke her leg today.
Yes, that's right.. her leg!! ACK! Totally bizarre and completely random incident that she likely will not let us forget for the remainder of our lives! Ajay had just finished changing her diaper, and Devi was reaching for a toy that she was playing with. Aj reached for the toy to help her grasp it.. and she suddenly kicked out at his chest (which was over the top of her) with her legs and then - I'm assuming - locked her knees - and somehow hyper-extended her left knee. This caused a 'buckle fracture' of her left tibia.
We were pretty surprised that the bone was broken. She cried at first.. and then was fussy for awhile.. and would not walk on the leg at all. We thought this was odd, as she is SUCH a walker. We thought we should take her in to an urgent care and have them look at it - thinking that it was a muscular issue. Boy were we shocked after they x-rayed and found the fracture! :((( Pooooor little baby. :((((( She isn't in pain when she isn't trying to use the leg... but she is constantly trying to use it. They put a splint on it and wrapped it tightly. They told us to make an appmt with an orthopedic doc at Children's Hospital asap. We have an appmt for Friday. I have a feeling that they are going to put a cast on it. 4-6 weeks without walking - ACK! Seriously I have no idea how this is going to work. Life has become more exciting once again. Especially as Aj has to travel next week from Saturday thru the following Friday. Ahh.. a challenge.
So - we didn't even make it to our 4 pm new year's party. We did end up with 4 bottles of champagne though. :D

Unbelievable. The number of physician visits we have made in 2 1/2 months.

Very. Very happy that we have both of our babies home with us. Very glad that we are embarking on a new year that does not include the anxiety associated with adopting/waiting for a new child (only b/c we have had this anxiety for ~4 years now). Very happy that 2008 is over and very hopeful that 2009 will bring MUCH less drama, anxiety, medical trauma, and exhaustion. :)

Wiggles. We love you - The Wiggles. We would probably not be sane after our 16-hr trip if we had not had you on DVD to serenade our children. I have no idea what it is, but this Australian group creats instant calm and commands attention of both of our girls. Even today, when Devika was in pain and freaking out b/c her leg was immobilized from hip to ankle - the Wiggles made her smile.

X-Chromosomes. Poor Aj - he is surrounded by a houseful of paired X-chromosome beings!!

Y? As taught to me in my high school senior religion class: 'Because in the great and eternal scheme of things, God has willed it so.'
Fr. O'Keefe would be so very proud. ;)

Zoo-a-philes. Ok, so I was listening to NPR last Sunday while I was prepping to embark on the big Road Trip. They were interviewing an author who had written a story about a man whose wife (or fiancee??) had died.. and he became obsessed with rare animals. He would break into zoos just to be close to certain animals. The interviewer asked the author (and I am so bummed that I cannot recall the author's name right now.. nor could I find it with a quick Google search) if this was completely fictional, or if she found in research that there are people who do this. She explained that there is an entire 'sub-culture' who are into animals and break into zoos regularly just to be close to a certain animal or animals. They do not intend to steal the animals.. they just feel a connection and want to be close to them. Could be something as small as a lizard or a bird - not necessarily a large animal such as a tiger or elephant, etc.
Now there's a piece of trivia, eh? :) And you thought I would have no entry for the letter 'Z'!

Well, there's the alphabet! That wasn't quite as fun as I had hoped. Oh well. It was a challenge!
I hope that all of you are having a fabulous, fun, and SAFE New Years Eve! 2008 was quite a year - I'm looking forward to a peaceful 2009!

It is 11:11 pm here in Mountain time. And we have 1/2 of a bottle of champagne left (out of the one we opened - not out of all 4 - HA! Good lord, that would lead to a painful beginning to the new year!).
Let's raise our glasses - A toast to all of us! Cheers!

The End of An Amazing Year!

2008-12-30T18:33:00.017-07:00

New Year's Eve! I cannot believe that tomorrow is New Year's Eve! And, as always, we have no babysitter. ;) We would only leave Devika with someone that she knew extremely well, and we don't have anyone like that yet. Not a problem - a friend of ours is throwing a child-friendly party that begins at 4 pm. Yes, that is when our partying begins. And will probably end for us by 7 pm. Sigh. We will have to leave ourselves a nice bottle of champagne at home so that Aj and I can actually toast the new year. I wonder if he will be awake at midnight? I might be toasting by myself. Maybe I'll call someone at midnight so that they can toast with me. Or - we could have a big 'virtual' toast. See you tomorrow night! haha.. hopefully no one else is looking forward to this lame of a celebration. ;)
But in all seriousness, this was quite a year! 2008 was our 'Year of Anticipation'.. but all is well that ends well. Our family really does 'feel' complete. Nothing feels better than saying '.. my girls ..'. :)
Which leads us quite nicely to the letter 'O'...

Ornery.

Well, they LOOK innocent enough..

Somehow I think that if you have to wear it on your hat.. you might be struggling between Santa's lists! ;)

Pacifier. Maya, since our India trip when we brought pacifiers in case Devika used one, has been obsessed with 'binkies'. On Xmas Eve, we were sitting in my mom's living room. She has a kid-friendly 'Veggie Tales' nativity set set right at Maya's eye level. Maya suddenly noticed the nativity set, grabbed the baby Jesus, and exclaimed, "Mom! Where is Jesus' binky??"

Queen. Ajay tried to use his line 'In my country, you would be queen!' on me the night we first met. If I recall correctly (and of course I do), he was trying to lure me into his rooftop hot-tub.
Sometimes I can't quite remember what possessed me to agree to our first date. ;) That first night that we met - at his friend's (and a coworker of mine) party - was 10 years ago next month. WOW.

Road trip!
Well, we survived our Xmas road trip! 16 hours each way, though we broke it into 2 days. It really wasn't bad, all things considered. On the way home we were smarter - we left earlier and drove only during daylight hours. Devika starts screaming when the sun goes down, and nothing makes her feel better. Maya was like that as a baby also.. so I wasn't surprised. On the way TO Indiana, we spent 2 hours each day listening to screaming b/c we weren't prepared.
On the way home, we had no problem. PHEW. Maya is a fantastic traveler - she was great. As was our lab, Tasha.
It was great to spend time with the family. I hate to see how thin my mom is - she needs to bulk up!! She kept apologizing for being so tired, but I thought she held up very well. Holidays, guests, etc. are very tiring for anyone - and she really kept up with it.
Everyone else was fun also.. we loved visiting Chicago and introducing Devika to some aunties, uncles, and cousins on both sides of the family. The photo above shows Devika with her Grandpa (Papa) - meeting Grandma Nanny (MY Grandma, who is 92). Devika did sooo well! So many new people, new accomodations, etc.. and she was very happy and personable. Maya was in heaven - she looooooooved the attention from her aunties and uncles and grandparents! I think she is suffering withdrawal now. This was really the first visit where she was loving and huggy to everyone.. and not attached to mommy. It was so fun to see how much fun she was having! And she definitely enjoyed Santa this year!
The next two photos: Middle : Sr Mary Joseph (Maya's 'Spiritual Godmother'), Devika, Andrew (Maya's cousin and partner-in-crime), Sr Marie (aka Auntie Mary-Toot), and Maya. Right: Maya entertains Grandma and Uncle Mike.

Stretching. You would think 'oh, 16 hours in a car - no movement - feel like a slug.'.
You would be so very wrong.
If you have 2 small children (and a dog) in an SUV so packed that there is NO space for sitting next to the kids or even placing your feet flat on the floor, you might want to warm up prior to the drive and prepare for some serious stretching exercises. I was quite surprised to find myself in a sort of mini work-out throughout our long drive this week. There was no sitting still. At ~10 minute intervals, something was always needed. One of the kids needed food or a DVD change or a new toy or.. blahblahblah. So I came up with some exercise names:
'Feed-Baby-the-Bottle Arm Extensions'
'Baby-Food-Administration Repetitive Shoulder Rotations'
'DVD-Swap Abdominal Twists'
and my favorite.. the 'Find-The-Misplaced-Bear Leg, Arm, and Upper Body Extensions/Rotations'

So.. 7 letters left for the last day of the year. Might have to get creative on a few of them. Maybe I'll blog post-champagne. That outta do it eh?
Hope all of you have a very fun and SAFE celebration tomorrow night! {or mid-day, depending on your situation - ha!}

Merry Christmas!

2008-12-24T22:10:00.002-07:00

Merry, Merry Christmas!

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
in hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
while visions of sugar plums danced in their heads.
And Mama in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap,
had just settled our brains for a long winter's nap.

When out on the roof there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
tore open the shutter, and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
gave the lustre of midday to objects below,
when, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
but a miniature sleigh and eight tiny reindeer.

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.
More rapid than eagles, his courses they came,
and he whistled and shouted and called them by name:
"Now Dasher! Now Dancer!Now, Prancer and Vixen!
On, Comet! On, Cupid!On, Donner and Blitzen!
To the top of the porch!To the top of the wall!
Now dash away! Dash away!Dash away all!"

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
when they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky
so up to the house-top the courses they flew,
with the sleigh full of toys, and St. Nicholas too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
the prancing and pawing of each little hoof.
As I drew in my head and was turning around,
down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound.

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
and his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot.
A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,
and he looked like a peddler just opening his pack.

His eyes--how they twinkled! His dimples, how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
and the beard on his chin was as white as the snow.
The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
and the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath.
He had a broad face and a little round belly,
that shook when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
and I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself.
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head
soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
and filled all the stockings, then turned with a jerk.
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
and giving a nod, up the chimney he rose.

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, 'ere he drove out of sight,
"Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"
~Clement Clarke Moore

..And a scene from my fav xmassy movie!

Hell-Cabbie

2008-12-20T15:52:00.003-07:00

Life. I very seriously thought that we might lose our lives today. We had a very frightening and bizarre experience. We are here in Chicago, visiting family. We grabbed a cab to head from Aj's cousin's condo downtown to my brother's condo in Lakeview. A cab ride that should have taken - oh maybe 15 minutes.. seemed to last an infintessimal amount of time. We found ourselves passengers in..

The Hell Cab.

Things started out pretty scary. The temps were freezing.. the roads were wet/slushy.. there was a bit of snow flurrying in the air. We piled into the van-cab: Aj, Mike, Maya, Devika, and myself. Hell-Cabbie immediately pulled out and accelerated well past the maximum speed limit. We flew down Lakeshore Drive - weaving in and out of traffic - creating our own lanes at times in median and side-of-the-road areas. There were several times that I thought we were goners. If you know LakeShore, you know that there really are NOT median or side-road areas. Needless to say, I was incredibly nervous. I glanced at my brother, seated next to me, and he gave me a somewhat startled and anxious eyebrow raise. I double-checked Maya's seatbelt and my own, and held Devika to me as tightly as humanly possible.

After turning off of Lakeshore, Hell-Cabbie decided that he did not want to wait in a normal queue for a red light, and veered around another cab - cutting him off and almost side-swiping him. Immediately the other cabbie honked.. and then.. all hell broke loose.

Hell-Cabbie began speeding up and slowing down, as did the other cabbie. They continally tried to cut each other off and cause an accident - running at least one red light and probably terrifying every other driver on the road. During this chase scene, Hell-Cabbie had his window rolled down and was literally SCREAMING at the other cabbie (who also kept stopping next to us and screaming out HIS window) - racial slurs and curses - screaming at him that he was a terrorist and he needed to go back to his own country. He began cursing Pakistanis, etc (um, hello, Indians in the cab!!). He barely watched his crazy driving, as he had his head out the window screaming and evil-laughing, "HIT ME! THAT'S RIGHT #%$#% HIT ME NOW! HIT ME HIT ME! I'LL KILL YOU! TRY TO KILL ME! I"LL KILL YOU NOW! HAAHAAHAAAAAAAA!!". My brother and I were seated directly behind him and began asking him to pull over and let us out. He ignored us - too busy screaming expletives, threatening, and making obscene hand gestures at the other cabbie.

Finally, after several blocks and extremely near-misses (he kept slamming on his brakes and gunning the accelerator in order to try to cause an accident).. the other cab was behind us and turned off at an intersection.

PHEW.

I tell you.. that was one of the scariest experiences I've had - especially as we had the girls with us, and Devika wasn't restrained. Maya was barely restrained, as she is much too small for a normal seat belt. I was literally shaking by the time he stopped in front of my brother's building.

We took down his cab # and reported him.

Yikes.

Icicles and Donuts

2008-12-18T21:51:00.004-07:00

Ice Storm! As I sit and type, I can hear the ice pellets bouncing off the roof of our house. Here we go! Come visit the midwest and experience an ice storm LIVE and IN PERSON! So exciting. What would really cap it all off is if the electric goes out and we are stuck with 2 little kiddies in a freezing house with no generator. Or maybe there is a generator here. Hm. Doubtful. We're staying at a guest house that my family's company keeps for use of sales people who travel here from out-of-town.

So our pending trip to The Windy City tomorrow morning isn't looking too good. I wonder if they are being hit by something right now also? I really was lucky tonite, as I was hanging with my parents - watching a Xmas movie and wrapping gifts - and just left ~30 minutes ago. The freezing rain actually began during my drive back to the house. Phew! That was a close one.

Omg, I just realized that we might be trapped in this house tomorrow with 4 lbs of chocolates. :D Too bad it is supposed to warm up into the 40's and melt the ice later in the day! What a great excuse..

Jewish. To all of my Jewish friends, I wish you a Happy Hanukkah! This year, Hanukkah begins at sundown on Sunday December 21 and ends at nightfall on Monday December 29. Maya loves the song 'Dreidel, Dreidel, Dreidel' - sung as only Barney can sing it.

Jokes. I LOVE stand-up comedy. Here's a clip-o-the-day:

"I notice that there are no 'B' batteries. I think that's to avoid confusion. Because if there were, you wouldn't know when someone was stuttering. " ~ Demetri Martin

Krispy Kreme. o m g. Need I really say more??

Well.. I'm going to. This reminds me of last year, when my favorite uncle - my mom's younger brother, Jim - passed away unexpectedly at the age of 58. :( Oo.. I should have done 'Jim' for the letter 'J'. Oh well. Anyhow..

So one of my favorite stories of all time about Jim (and there were oooh soooo many stories!) was when he was a teenager and landed a job as a delivery boy for a local donut shop. Jim, who was notorious throughout his life for eating-escapades, was more than thrilled. On his first day on the job - he ate 71 donuts.

No, that is not a typo.

After Jim's funeral last October, I bought 71 Krispy Kreme donuts to commemorate his life. I didn't EAT all of them.. but I shared them (and the story) with everyone at the post-funeral gathering. It brought a smile to everyone's face and left another fun memory of Jim with his friends and family. He would have loved it. Ahh.. we miss you Uncle Jim! Still expect to see you walk thru the door.

Mmm. Krispy Kremes. Wonder if they are open during ice storms...

A Little Catch-Up

2008-12-17T19:45:00.004-07:00

Eating. Ah, but we love the holiday season, don’t we? Such a fabulous excuse for stuffing your face with food you wouldn’t touch during ‘ordinary’ seasons. In the past 24 hrs, I have ingested chocolates, caramel popcorn, some hideously rich and fattening chocolate pie made by my sister (so I just could NOT refuse, right??), wine, chocolate cookies, and cheese pizza. I am so grossed-out and disgusted with myself. I think maybe I will not eat anything tomorrow that is not completely healthy (and yes, a Starbux nonfat latte is my very necessary source of calcium!!). Maybe I’ll even do some form of exercise that does not involve lifting food or drink to my mouth. Hmm.. shopping is good exercise, right?
It might be time to break out that Wiggles Xmas DVD and dance with the girls again!
Echo. If you want to see every bad habit that you have – live with a 3-yr old. They are little ‘mirrors’, reflecting back all of your bad habits to you. I keep seeing myself in my daughter, and several of the things that I see do not make me happy! Criminy. The other day I heard her say ‘Dammit, dog!’. Oops. Yesterday I started noticing that she is chewing her fingernails. I think that comes from Daddy, as I never picked up that bad habit. Or did I?

Flip. Have you seen or used the Flip Camcorder? Best camcorder ever for technically-challenged persons! Now, I do not mean myself.. seriously, I am extremely technically-literate and very good at programming and using electronic items. My husband, on the other hand, .. not so much.
Last Christmas I found this amazing product and gave it to Aj as a gift. It has been the best gift ever! There is a button to turn on the camcorder. A button to record and stop recording (same large, red button – very obvious, phew). In order to upload the videos to your computer, a little USB connector ‘flips’ out – insert into your computer – and the software takes over from that point (on it’s own.. it is oh-so-easy). It’s cute, fun, and EASY!!

Little Girls.
Some women are dripping with diamonds
Some women are dripping with pearls
Lucky me! Lucky me!
Look at what I'm dripping with..
Little girls!!
This is Maya’s favorite song from the Annie movie. She loves to watch a few scenes from this show, over and over and over and over.. this is one of them.

I’m not sure how I feel about that?

Health. Soo.. you would think that maybe.. just maybe.. we could make it ONE week without a trip to the pediatrician. Since arriving home from India, we have made a trip to our pediatrician pretty much once or twice per week for one or both of the girls. I thought that surely we would be ok for 2 weeks while traveling. We already have one child on medication that should get HER through 2 weeks..
Ah, but I was mistaken. I had to take Maya to the local urgent care clinic today to check out her fever/body aches/runny nose. Turns out that she has a sinus infection. Now we have both of our kids on pretty pink liquid medicines. Sigh.

2008-12-16T21:54:00.004-07:00

Driving. Yes, we took our lives in our own hands and drove 2 consecutive days of ~9-10 hrs each – to reach my family in the Midwest this past weekend. Wow. That really wasn’t fun.
First of all, poor little Devika freaked out completely when she saw the suitcases being packed. My guess is that she remembered those suitcases from the India trip and was scared that things were going to change again. She screamed and screamed – was quite inconsolable. Poor little whoo. :(
Once on the road, she did pretty well for most of the day. When the sun went down and it was dark in the car (except for the dual DVD player, which lit things up nicely with scenes of Barney).. she began crying and would not stop. It was either the dark.. or the time of day (tired).. I don’t know for sure. I do know that Maya, when she was only home for a few months, freaked out in her carseat when it became dark. Poor little things.
Anyhow, we had 2 more hours in the car both days when the sun set and the baby started melting. Blaaaah. Loooong 2 hours. Luckily, Maya did pretty well. No sleeping, but a decent attitude.

We also were lucky to beat the blizzards - phew! We had perfect weather.
So – we are here! Yippee! Phew. That black-Friday-dual-dvd-player-purchase saved our lives. No joke. I LOVE Barney. (Delia, feel free to pass that on to your friend (yes she knows the real man behind the dinosaur!)

Decorations. In the spirit of the season, I tried to help my parents decorate their house tonight. My mom has been out of energy from her cancer treatments, and my dad has a horrid sinus infection. They have their tree up, but nothing else. I decided that they needed a bit more cheer, and I should try to help them out.
I was at their house tonight doing some laundry (good LORD how do 2 little children create such an ungodly amount of laundry??).. while they were out at dinner (during a snow and ice storm.. yikes). I thought to myself, ‘Hey! Great time to get into their xmas stash and put out some décor while they are not here to stop me!’.

I dug into their little closet under the stairs, and pulled out a few items. One was a small reindeer made out of logs. Too cute. I grabbed him and brought him upstairs.. setting him up in a prime location in front of the fireplace. I grabbed the electrical cord attached to his.. um.. her?.. um.. ‘nether regions’.. and plugged him in.
Nothing.
I sat back and looked closely at the face of the reindeer. Didn’t I recall that something was supposed to light up? Did I leave a piece of his antlers or something in the basement closet?
I bent my head closer to inspect the face of the little guy.. was about 2” from his nose.. when all of a sudden… POP! KZUTP! A lovely electrical snapping sound.. and a decent sized puff of smoke suddenly erupted from the reindeer’s nose!
Omg. I try to do something nice and I almost create an electrical fire in my parents’ living room. Upon closer inspection of the disgruntled Rudolph, I notice that his nose – which had once had a lightbulb and red cover – was smashed in. Poor guy.. wonder who he upset during a past Xmas celebration? Or.. maybe he wasn’t leading the pack during the last Xmas sleigh ride and there was a bit of a ‘back up’. Heehee..

So needless to say, I decided to chill on the Xmas décor and only put a few ‘safe’ items out for them. Hopefully they don’t mind. If they do, I’ll remove it the day after Christmas.

So I have obviously missed several blogging days. I decided to save room in the car and not bring my laptop. Sadly, my hubbie has had to freaking WORK every day we’ve been here, and I get no time to borrow HIS laptop… so things are not working out as I thought they would. Plus, Maya was sick with a fever the past couple of nights and was attached to me at night.
We somehow accidentally left Bear-Bear at home when we took off in the car – realized it after a couple of hours (yes, we are SO freaking stupid).. and she cried for bear every day and night until we finally rec’d him today. I had to take Bear’s place and be the ‘huggy-bear’ when needed. A HUGE thanks to our neighbors for going into our house (tripping the alarm – hahahaa!), locating Bear-Bear, and fed-exing him to us. Life-savers!!!!!!!!!

So I have to sign off – stupid battery is dying on this crappy laptop and it is almost midnight. I have photos to hopefully upload tomorrow. If I can manage doing this while keeping Devika from licking outlets (yes, I heard that she did this while on Daddy’s watch today omg) and keeping both girls runny noses from dripping all over their faces. UGH. Change of weather has not been good for them.

Until tomorrow.. and maybe we'll cram 10 letters or so into one entry. ;) I'm feeling a little poetic, look out! haa

2008-12-08T21:47:00.003-07:00

All my life, I searched for a special person. Someone who could make me feel.. at peace.. joyful. Someone whom I could spend even 30 short minutes with, and part from with such a feeling of satisfaction and rejuvenation – that I almost want to skip like a child. Someone who boosts my confidence in myself and makes life a little more worth living.

I searched and I searched and I searched. For decades I entered into relationships – one after another – and was left feeling miserable and unfulfilled. I searched in several different cities, and several different states. I was ‘fixed up’ by friends.. by the internet.. by random meetings.

And just when despair had set in and all hope had evaporated.. I found him.

They always say that you find someone when you stop looking, right? Well.. this was true for me.

I found my special person.

I found.. Chad.

That’s right.. Chad. Hair artist extraordinaire. Finally, after many, many years of slinking out of salons with my head bowed .. walking as quickly as possible to my car {which I purposefully always parked in the closest possible location to the salon entrance}.. I can hold my head high.

Chad – you are loved. Merry Christmas from me.. and my hair.

{thank god you did not see me at the Embassy in Delhi, as you would have finally broken me down and forced me to do 'the big cut' that you are always hoping for!}

Christmas

Maya and I partook in a holiday event at a local museum on Saturday night. It was very fun! She was able to visit Santa, see live reindeer, watch The Grinch (or – Mr. Grinch as she calls it) on a movie screen, etc. Luckily we arrived when the event opened, and we did not have any lines. Thank god we made this decision, as the lines were HUGE when we left.

Maya was very excited to visit Santa and tell him her big gift wish for this Xmas: Thomas the Train pajamas – or as she says ‘Thomas Jam-Jams’. Santa seemed a little confused regarding her request.. and he suggested that maybe she had a few other items she might be interested in.. but she insisted on the Thomas Jams!

No problem Santa, we’ll follow up with a letter and explain in detail.

Child Cuteness

So a kiddo update of the day: Devika had a pediatrician appmt today and weighed in at 14 lbs 10.2 oz. Whoohoo! And.. she is 27 ½ inches! She has gained a little over a lb and grown an inch since her last 'well child'. Her head circumference is also growing appropriately to her height.

No wonder she sleeps so well –she is growing like a weed! The doc was not completely happy with her weight gain however.. I guess she should be gaining more. She is closing in on the 3^rd percentile in height and head, but her weight is still not on the chart.

She is either allergic to milk products or lactose intolerant, so the doctor has referred us to an allergist so we can find out for sure. This way we will know exactly what we can and cannot feed her. It is difficult to give her weight-gaining foods, as most of them are dairy.

Poor little Devi also had to have her ear flushed (again).. and it was a hideous nightmare for her (again), as well as for the 3 of us who were holding her down. I felt sooo sorry for her. She was just terrified. Glad we flushed it though, as it turned out to be infected. I can’t believe she has an ear infection and is totally happy all the time. She is SUCH a super-happy baby these days. It’s amazing! Just adorable.

Devi is also doing a couple of signs – eat, more, and all-done. She loves to point to her nose. She says ‘Mama’ and ‘Dada’ (btw 3 saturdays ago she said ‘mama’ – and it was her first word – yay!).. and repeats the ‘b’ sound for ‘ball’ and the ‘d’ sound for ‘dog’. She climbs EVERYTHING.. we had to gate off the stairs. She is a bit scary b/c she will do tumbles off of anything – purposefully – and has no fear. She will stack anything she can find in order to climb it. This is soo different than Maya!

Maya is also doing well. Slowly, slowly adjusting to being a big sister. She loves to feed Devi, so I let her do this quite often. She always wants to help get Devika up from her naps/sleep and to put her down. She tries to hug Devi and tell her how cute she is. Unfortunately, Devi does not want to be held down very often by anyone – so this often ends a bit ugly.. but she tries.

Maya is also into having long conversations with me.. long, rambling conversations that change subjects very randomly. Some of her fav topics include the fact that ‘someday I will grow up and be a boy and pee standing up’ (sigh).. Thomas the Train.. and school. She pretends to be her teacher, Ms Kristin, constantly. SIT ON THE BROWN CARPET! YOU HIT NICO – GO SIT ON THE BROWN CARPET! Now, she doesn’t hit at school – a couple other kids do (believe it or not – her teacher backs this up) – but she sure luvs to yell at fake people for doing it. She sits in her little chair and pretends to read books.. I can’t even read her books anymore b/c she refuses to be the listener – only wants to be the reader. Too funny.

She has figured out that when she gets in trouble, it helps to suddenly be super-cute and give hugs/kisses and tell Mom how much she loves her. Sigh.

Maya finally began walking up and down stairs without requiring holding very tightly to the banisters or a hand – just last week. Yay Maya!!

Ok, so I now am in this phase where I think my kids are the cutest, most amazing beings on the face of the earth (or maybe in the entire universe..) - until ~5 pm every day. And then I keep trying to remind myself of the earlier thoughts of the day. It is simply amazing to me how much a child (and Mommy) can change during the day.

Crap

*Ok I missed a couple of blogging days. I'll catch up. I swear I'll end the year on a Z or else. ;)

*So I work my butt off to decorate my house for the holidays.. and I just cannot get the dam star to sit straight on the top of the tree. Seriously - why is this so difficult?? Check out the photo in the slideshow below. Grr.

*My living room cable box died 2 days ago and the new one which is being fed-ex'd from the idiot cable/satellite/whomever people.. is not here yet. Thank GOD this isn't the DVR or I might have to cry. Yes, I am addicted to certain shows (Gray's, House, How I Met Your Mother, Survivor) and freak out a little if I miss them.

2008-12-04T20:07:00.002-07:00

Blizzard! Ok, so it wasn't a blizzard exactly.. but we got a few more inches of snow today. Probably 3" or so. I think we had ~4" a couple days ago.. so it's been nice and holiday-ish. Very festive!

Bonkers! Yes, I was stuck inside the house today with the kids. Maya and I tried to go outside and play in the snow, but it was soooo freaking cold that we spent more time getting dressed to go outside than we did actually being outside. Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! We threw the ball to the dog a few times.. made some snow angels.. and then came back inside to enjoy some nice peppermint ice-cream. Yes, I thought that hot cocoa (or maybe a nice hot toddy.. ) would be more suitable - but Maya insisted on the ice-cream! She needs the fat, so I wasn't going to argue.
During our hours indoors today, we did have some fun. We baked brownies.. the girls destroyed the house multiple times by dragging out every toy, pot, pan, piece of tupperware, etc that we own.. and the highlight: a big Wiggles Xmas dance party (ding dong.. ringy dingy dingy.. will that song EVER leave my head??)! Thank you Thank you to the Wiggles!! Both girls were enthralled for over an hour - and they burned off a lot of energy. PHEW.

Brown. Have I mentioned recently that Maya is very intrigued by the fact that she is 'brown'? I think that I have. This is a constant subject of conversation with her. Mommy is light.. Maya is brown. Is Maya light? NOOOOOOO.. Maya is BROWN! Is Mommy brown? NOOOOOOOOO.. Mommy is VERY light! So funny to see her figuring this out.
Seems like our little girl is learning all kinds of new things/concepts at preschool. Ah, stories for another day.
Just wait until we get to the letter 'P'.

Bath. I'm dying to sit in a hot bubble bath with a nice glass of vino and my latest Twilight book. Too bad I just can't get the motivation for even this once the girls are asleep. I blog because I can do it from my bed, enjoying the warm electric blankie, the fireplace, and my DVR'd shows until I pass out. Of course, when Aj is home and I'm not doing the 'single mom' thing.. I'm catching up on my book!

Blonde. Every time Maya sees a picture of Cinderella, she tells me that she is 'Mommy'. My god I love that girl!

Boogie.

Counting Down

2008-12-03T21:24:00.003-07:00

Can you believe that we are counting down the last few days of 2008?? I find this so difficult to believe. The days fly by, and the years go just as quickly. I try to remember being a child and thinking that the months dragged by so hideously slowly - and I just could not WAIT for.. Xmas, summer, turning 16, turning 18, turning 21, getting married, having a dog, having a child.
Now I desperately wish that we could go back to that time. Well.. don't get me wrong.. I sure as heck don't want to be in high school again.. but college was pretty awesome. And any time after that was pretty good in the grand scheme of things. I'm just beginning to feel mortality creeping up, and I long for those days when everyone I knew was happy and healthy.. and we just worried about stupid things like - oh, say - what to buy for Xmas. sigh.

Anyhow, I recently came upon a blog-scheme that I never have tried out. Since I seem quite behind the times on this, I'm going to do it now. I luv themes (parties, photos, trips, etc) - and this goes very well with my compulsion.
To end the year, I am going to theme each blog entry with a letter of the alphabet and blog topics that correlate to the letter of the day. Sound annoying? Yeah, probably . Whatever. Surf away if you so desire... or stay and join the party. Feel free to comment and add to the post. I luv to hear from my blog followers!

"A is A"
~ Aristotle
For all of you that know The Big Daddy Neal - that's a shout-out to him.

Advent. Here we are in the Advent/Christmas season. We're heading on our yearly looong road trip to hang with family over the Christmas holiday. We leave early this year.. next week in fact. I'll be blogging some letters from the road.. so stay tuned to that exciting time in my life. Good lord - I can't even begin to imagine the level of insanity I might reach after 2 days on the road with a toddler and a 16-mo old who HATES her car seat. Maybe 'A' should stand for 'ARGH'. Or 'asinine'.
I am looking forward to seeing everyone and introducing Devika to the family. No members of either of our families has yet to meet her, so this will be nice. {'A'ssuming we make it}
Also, this is my very favorite time of the year. I luv, luv, luv the weeks leading up to Xmas! Xmas day is actually a little depressing to me. Xmas-eve is my favorite day. If I die on Xmas day sometime in the future, you will know that I made it thru my fav day first. ;)

Aj. Today is Aj's birthday. My love, my soul mate.
Love is that condition in which
The happiness of another person
Is essential to your own.
~Robert A. Heinlein
Happy Birthday Sweetie!! Be happy on this celebration of a day which turned out to be darn important to ME! Ok, and a lot of other people. But we know who really matters, right? Right?? ;)
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxxoxo Miss U.

American. I am proud to be an American, and will be especially proud to be an American on the day that President Obama is inaugerated.
I am very, horribly saddened by the events in Mumbai last week against Americans (British, Indian, and any other citizens who were affected). We were very worried about this type of event when we were traveling in India. I had wondered if we might have been a bit too paranoid - until last week. I know that a terrorist incident could happen anywhere at any time.. but things in India have been quite unstable lately. Ok, always a bit unstable.. but even our Indian relatives have been worried about the stability in the country of late.
Thank god we traveled prior to this.. and thank god none of our friends or family were directly impacted. Aj did have a friend in Mumbai at this time, but not staying at a hotel and not in the wrong place at the wrong time.
I am just simply devastated by what happened. My prayers go out to everyone affected by this horrific tragedy.

Amour, Adoration, Affection

Sisters

2008-11-21T13:46:00.003-07:00

"Big sisters are the crab grass in the lawn of life."

~ Charles M. Schulz

Feelin Like A Fur Hag

2008-11-17T20:50:00.003-07:00

Ever get the feeling that you are living a sitcom? Sometimes I think that I must be being 'punked' or something.. yet I never see any video playback. Thank god. My life sometimes reminds me of 'I Love Lucy' (my mom's all-time fav show, so I've seen many, many, many episodes}.
So if someone out there is filming a 'The Truman Show' type series on my life.. I hope you are enjoying.

Today's show opens with Mom and the 2 girls, busy in the kitchen.
3 yr old is whining loudly that she wants to sit in the highchair and be fed like a baby.
Baby is extremely tired and is trying to walk to mom and grab her leg, falling every other step and bursting into loud sobs.
Mom is trying to cook dinner for herself and 3-yr old (pasta is close to boiling over, oven timer is beeping, pasta sauce is bubbling away) as well as prepare a soy-formula-plus-Carnation-breakfast-micro'd-25-seconds-in-coffee-mug-first-bottle for (seemingly lactose-intolerant..ick) baby.
Mom opens the new formula can - crrrrrrrrrrrrk! - and POOF!
What must be a full cup of formula powder explodes from the can and instantly covers mom's face, mom's clothing, the countertop, the floor, part of the dog's head, and the top of the baby's head.
A moment of silence.

Haa.. Ok I enjoyed the title of this blog post. Hopefully my readers get the link b/t my day and Lindsay Lohan's encounter with PETA recently (it's on the news as I type). Yes, this is the kind of entertainment I get when the kids go to sleep by 7:30 pm, hubby is traveling, and I am out of vino. ;)

Ok, so off-subject, but I somehow (and please don't ask, but I'm really not sure how).. stumbled across the following video today. I laugh b/c it sounds so much like my MIL in the beginning '...this is a very popular dish with my husband.. you can feed him this every day." Heehee.. :) Ok that doesn't sound funny when I read back thru this.. but if you have an Indian MIL, you might appreciate (it's cute really!). I am so easily entertained these days I guess.
But in all honesty, I'm a little excited to find that these recipes are on youtube. I was just thinking today that, although our India trip was a bit painful and kept painfully hanging on for weeks after our return.. I soooo miss the food! Amy's brand micro-meals are good, but they aren't the real thing. {omg, I hope my MIL did not just read that!}

Just When You Thought..

2008-11-13T19:07:00.005-07:00

..that you are ready to hide in the back of the closet and cry because you are feeling overwhelmed by toddlers who are screaming, crying, hitting each other, fighting over toys, banging pans, licking shoes, smacking their heads into the hardwood flooring, spilling drinks, smacking yogurt across the kitchen, having blow-outs in their diapers, refusing to eat the dinner you managed to cook while being clung to like a life preserver in the middle of a raging ocean.. you are suddenly overwhelmed by cuteness and you almost.. almost.. forget the stress.

After I put Devika to bed this evening (at 6:30 - she was sooo tired - thank god!) - I took Maya outside to look at the gorgeous full moon.
There were the perfect amount of clouds surrounding it, so it reflected off the edges of the clouds and lit up the sky. The moonlight bounced off of the gurgling stream and reflected into the still pond, and a very light breeze rustled through the few remaining crispy leaves still clinging to the Aspens.
Maya padded out onto the moonlit deck in her roomy red footed-blanket-jammies (aka 'baby jammies').. and stood looking with wonder at the beautiful sky.
After a minute or so, a small voice filled with awe arose ~
'Mommy? Could you please lift me up so I can touch it?
I need to touch it please, Mommy.'
So I lifted her up and told her to reach out her arm.. but alas, she still could not reach the glowing moon.
'I can't reach it! Could you please stand on something tall?'

:) I took this moment to tell her that the only way that she could reach the moon would be to go to school and study very, very hard.. so that some day she could become an astronaut and could take a rocket to the moon.
'With Mommy??' she asked. 'Hmm.. we'll have to see about that.' I replied.
Now she is totally psyched to go to school tomorrow. And I'm totally psyched to end this day and start it all over again.

My Name Is Devika!

2008-11-11T12:23:00.011-07:00

Hi, my name is Devika!
I'm a funny little girl!
I love to dance and bang my head,
I'm learning how to twirl!

I'm only 13 lbs,
But I'm as strong as 33!
I do perfect somersaults,
It's something everyone should see!

When I came home
I was scared
My parents feared the worst.

I screamed and cried and rocked,
My parents worried I would burst!

Now I've been home
For 4 short weeks
The time has really flown!

It's amazing how much I've changed
And how big and tall I've grown!

I'm happy now,
I laugh a lot!
I've blossomed so fully
In the love that I've sought!

I'm pudgy and bouncy,
I jump and I walk.
I play with my sister,
I'm learning to talk!

Life as a family
Is so special you see?
I love my family
And they all love me!

Stomp-in

2008-11-09T13:48:00.001-07:00

Maybe the girls are working up toward joining 'Stomp'?

Facts and Updates

2008-11-09T11:32:00.004-07:00

In the spirit of National Adoption Month, here are a few facts that point to the crisis occurring worldwide in regard to children who are orphaned/homeless:

There are estimated to be approximately 143 million orphaned or homeless children in the world today. Different sources quote different numbers (Joint Council on International Childrens Services, UNICEF, etc).. but that number seems to be an average.

200 million children under the age of 5 are malnourished (Global Health Council)

Each year, more than 10 million children in low- and middle-income countries die before reaching their fifth birthday. Seven in 10 of these deaths are due to just five preventable and treatable conditions, or often a combination of them: pneumonia, diarrhea, malaria, measles, and malnutrition. (World Health Organization)

Makes you think eh? Sure we are having massive economical issues within our country - and worldwide - but many (if not most of the blog-reading community) of us still have roofs over our heads, food on our tables, and clothing to keep us warm and protected. Not to mention computers to blog on! My request for all of you who are reading this post: PLEASE take a minute out of your busy holiday preparations this year and think about these kids. PLEASE find it within yourselves to give a few dollars to help with this global crisis. If we all do a little, we can achieve so very much.

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In other, more personal news. All of you who told me that 2 kids are more than double the work of 1 child - you weren't kidding! Ok, I'm looking at this from the perspective of having 2 kids with bad colds. This is one of those days that we will go thru at least 1/2 a box of tissues. Not to mention the number of uses of that dreaded nasal aspirator and the saline spray. Y U C K. It's a challenge, that's for sure! When Maya sees the bottle of saline spray come out of the cabinet, she mysteriously disappears with total silence! I might start using this as a sanity break in the future.. ha!
I recently put Devika down for a nap. I propped up one side of her mattress to help her breathe while napping... and of course she fell asleep with her head at the opposite end of the mattress and her feet at the high end. Sigh.
Now Maya is smacking her toy piano keys and yelling out 'Mommy could you PLEASE DANCE WHILE I PLAY???!!!' 'MOMMY! YOU HAVE TO DANCE! DANCE DANCE!' Criminy.
Yesterday Maya and I had 'Mommy and Maya Day' and ventured out to a local museum which had the Grossology exhibit on display. Now THAT was interesting! Seriously, I never had the need to know that much information about vomit/poop/hairballs/gas/belching. I do have to admit that I found much of it pretty entertaining though. :) Especially Maya's reaction to the 'scent' exhibit. We didn't linger at that one!

Funny story from yesterday:
We are in the car (all of us), and Aj is driving. Some woman turns in front of him and is driving quite slowly. Aj yells 'Hurry up - IDIOT!'. Suddenly Maya yells (mimicking Daddy's tone perfectly): 'Hurry up - INDIAN!'.
Haahaa.. ok we found this hilarious and laughed so hard that Daddy almost had to pull over!

Maya update: She is doing so well at her school! She is now actually interacting well with the other kids (not playing alone), and likes to answer questions during 'math', etc. She loves dancing - I'm going to sign her up for dance classes which are held by a 3rd party teacher at the school. She loves singing songs - finally she is singing again. She stopped for a couple wks after India - a big sign that she was going thru some tough adjustments.
She has recently discovered her skin color is 'dark'. Must be from school. There are no other dark-skinned kids in the preschool classes. She constantly talks, quite matter-of-fact-ly, about how she and Devika and Daddy are 'dark' and Mommy is 'light'. She doesn't ask questions or seem concerned about it.. just making note.
She luvs using her kid-scissors, luvs stickers, luvs anything messy, luvs poop (don't ask.. but yes, it is called 'the anal stage' of life for a reason..ick), luvs swings (still), luvs diapering dolls/bears/thomas the train/her sister, luvs reading books to me (more than listening these days), luvs new clothes/shoes, luvs slurping on 'bottles', being treated like a baby, going to the store/museum/postoffice/coffee shop, talking about her grandparents, and food (thank god - this is a new one!!).

A little Devika-update: She is still doing great, other than the respiratory issues. We ventured out to a party last night (she wasn't bad yesterday, obv this wasn't the best idea on our part..) and she had so much fun! She didn't seem overwhelmed by the amt of adults and kids. She ate several teeny bites of my pizza (as did Maya and another girl.. I had no bites myself - felt like I was a momma-bird).. she crawled and cruised all over the house.. she licked the drink cooler (oops.. taking after mommy already!).
She has been working hard on her walking - she can now take up to 6 or 7 steps, though she has to stop a few times to gain her balance. She is in the drunken-sailor phase! It is so cute. :))
She has gained an entire pound and 1/4" since her first doc appmt - yay! She is still best-fitting-into 3-6 month clothing, but can wear a few of her 6-month outfits. Depends on the brand. She is hungry ALL the time. It's insane! Sometimes we forget.. she is whiny.. we suddenly think 'could she want food.. AGAIN??'.. and yep - that's the solution! Keep it up little girl!
She has a word for 'daddy' and a word for 'mommy'.. though daddy is something like 'de-jjjjj'.. and mommy is something that begins with the 'm' sound and goes in another direction. She hates having her nose wiped, face wiped, bathing, putting on clothing, touches to her hair/head, going into her bedroom, and having toys taken away by her sister. She loves taking toys from her sister, food, hugs, toys, the dog, picking her nose (ugh), dancing/music, the phone ringing, and taking steps.
Devika has a very strong personality and a cute sense of humor that is beginning to show. Daddy calls parenting the girl 'the taming of the shrew'. I'm not sure that is very nice sounding, but he means it in a very loving way. ;)

Phew. Can't believe I had time to blog all of this today! Now baby is waking and Maya needs more food/attention. The Jets are WINNING (omg!).. Daddy just made me a Mimosa.. so it's mommy-time. Happy Sunday!

National Adoption Month

2008-11-02T19:41:00.005-07:00

We've gone purple again, in honor of National Adoption Month!

National Adoption Day is a collective national effort to raise awareness of the 129,000 children in foster care waiting to find permanent, loving families. For the last eight years, National Adoption Day has made the dreams of thousands of children come true by working with courts, judges, attorneys, adoption professionals, child welfare agencies and advocates to finalize adoptions and find permanent, loving homes for children in foster care.

Celebrated in all 50 states, the District of Columbia and Puerto Rico, more than 300 events are held each year throughout the country to finalize the adoptions of children in foster care, and to celebrate all families who adopt. In total, more than 20,000 children have been adopted from foster care on National Adoption Day. This year, National Adoption Day will be Saturday, November 15, 2008*. {NationalAdoptionDay.org}

I was privileged, myself, to help one of the sponsors of National Adoption Day - the Dave Thomas Foundation and Wendy's Wonderful Kids ~ Heart Gallery. I recently photographed two children who are waiting in foster care, hoping to be adopted. It was a wonderful experience, though also difficult. Both kids were so filled with personality - cute/smart/charming. I wanted to take them both home with me. One of them had the deepest eyes.. eyes that looked as if they have seen much more than they should have seen in his short 10 years. I have a photo of him that truly moves me. This photo gallery will be displayed and moved to different cities within our state - displayed in airport/museums/etc - in the hopes that an interested family will be found for them.

The Dave Thomas Foundation also sponsors A Home for the Holidays ~ which is a television special which is now in its 10th year. I LOVE this show and have seen it every year somehow. I don't think I've ever missed one - I just always happen onto it. The past couple of years I have actually looked and planned for it.. but all other years were just coincidental.
In 2007, the celebrity line-up included Sheryl Crow, James Blunt, Karmina, Carole King, and Reba McEntire. David Krumholtz, comedian George Lopez and René Russo who were among the celebrities that presented inspirational stories of extraordinary families who shared the joys found through foster care adoption.
Anyhow, the show is airing this year on CBS - Tuesday, December 23rd 8-9 pm EST/PST and 7-8 pm CST/MST. If you have never seen this show, you should NOT miss it. It is just such a moving show. I always get teary. {ok i don't watch it with just anyone.. so if i ditch you on the 23rd at that time, it is nothing personal.. haha}

As an adoptive parent of two beautiful, amazing little girls.. I feel a strong drive within myself to help bring together other adoptive families. I don't know when or even if Aj and I will decide to adopt again (not for awhile, I don't think I'm mentally capable of dealing with 3 toddlers/pre-schoolers while my hubby travels for work. We are doing a 'looong pause' at this point of our lives to see how things progress for us as a family. When we adopted Maya, we KNEW we wanted another immediately. We began the adoption applications - mailed in part I - on the same day that we finalized Maya's legal adoption. It was a very happy and exciting day for many reasons.

We won't be rushing into the next process as quickly. Time to take a breather.. pad up the bank accounts a bit more (they've taken quite a pounding between 2 back-to-back int'l adoption processes and then the stock market movements), and carefully consider next steps. We have actually begun talking about other adoption-related ventures that we are both very interested in. We will begin to explore these soon.. and hopefully start taking baby steps in that direction (more in the lines of fund-raising/advocating/education). I'm very excited just thinking about possible options. We are both very entrepreneurial, and we both hold this passion. I think that, working as a team (and utilizing some of the networking we have acquired over the past 4 years), we could come up with something incredible. We have a mission in life, and we are beginning to work our way toward setting it into motion and fulfilling our goals. We hope that, in fulfilling our goals, we are also setting others out on a mission with the same goals.. and that this continues. So much needs to be done to help the innocent children in this world - children who need families/love/support/etc. in order to become their true selves and live full lives.

We love our kids so much.. it is painful to consider all the children who might never feel the love of family. It probably hurts you more when you actually step into an orphanage.. or if you meet with foster kids.. and you see their faces. They don't even need to say anything - it's in the eyes.

Hope.

Here's to Hope ~ that through this month of advocating events in cities, towns, businesses, etc.. many, many, new families are created or grown.

Further information can be found by visiting the following sites: www.davethomasfoundation.org; www.RainbowKids.com; http://adoption.about.com/od/adopting/a/allaboutnam.htm

On The Way Up

2008-11-01T21:01:00.003-07:00

I don't have much time, but wanted to post and update that things are on their way up. Devika had a GREAT day today! She really acts like a normal baby now, and we only rarely see the grieving or clinging-to-daddy, etc. She has actually cried when I left the room (even tho Daddy was still with her).. and has been so cute, smiley, and fun! Her older sister is still dealing with the transition, and I guess it will take awhile. I worry occasionally b/c Maya gets a bit 'violent' and really tries to hurt the baby. We are now doing a 'yellow light, red light' method. If we say 'yellow light', it means she is treading on THIN ice.. and if we say 'red light', she is immediately removed from the room and put in her toy room with the door shut in order to calm down. So far it seems to be working somewhat.. and at least we aren't yelling at her or trying to be calm while she could be actually hurting Devika.
Argh. So much to learn, so much to learn. And when I say that, I mean for US as parents!
But once in awhile, I see a glimmer of hope. I love, love, LOVE to see the two girls playing together. I can just imagine days to come. I can't wait! :) They are so darn cute.
Halloween was a fun time. Maya went out with Daddy and our neighbors.. while I stayed at home with D and the neighbor mom. It was a nice relaxing evening for me.. and Maya had a lot of fun. It was good for her to be away from baby and doing something where she was more the center of attention and where she was hanging out with a young teenager rather than a preschooler or baby.
Devika is REALLY trying to walk lately! Today she spent about 30 minutes trying to walk, falling, trying again. She got 4-5 steps at the most, but she is looking stronger!! Again, oh so darn cute!! She laughs and plays most of the time and is a very cute and snuggly little girl. I can't wait to see how adventurous she gets and how fast she can run in a couple of months!
Here's a little video from our Halloween.. :)

Make It A Double!..and other new parent epithets..

2008-10-29T20:16:00.005-07:00

Life has become so crazy/insane/fun/chaotic/overwhelming/painful/amazing/etc.. in the past 2 weeks, I have not been able to find time to complete a blog post. Actually I think that I have completed one and updated it several times.. but wanted to include photos. I finally found time to upload some photos (in a very simple slideshow - just wanted to show friends and fam some photos!!) and include them with this post. So here we are. FINALLY. Feel free to skim thru - I just want to write all of this info for memories sake.

So let’s back up and update a little bit. First of all, I wrote most of this post last night with a nice big chilly glass of expensive Chardonnay in my hand. Why? Because, more than ever, I dam well deserved it!! Ha! I know.. just having some growing pains – growing into a family of four (or five, as we cannot forget our needy yellow lab!). Yesterday was painful because we had to visit the pediatrician.. again.. with both girls together.. again (somehow it worked out this way last week also and was completely traumatic). This is NOT the way to visit the doctor.

Maya turns into Ms-I-Need-Attention-So-I-Am-Going-To-Scream-My-Butt-Off-The-Entire-Time-Louder-Than-My-Sister. Granted, she had a stomach ache and wasn’t feeling well.. but good LORD. There was no consoling this loud little girl until she finally was able to pass the ‘ache’ into the toilet. Sigh. And then our new little Ms-I-Will-Not-Be-Restrained-By-Anything-Man-Or-Manmade-Don’t-Even-TRY-The-Velcro-Straightjacket-On-Me!!!.. screamed like she was losing an appendage while the nurse washed an ungodly amount of wax from her poor tiny little ear. Sigh.

Sadly this was not our first visit to the pediatrician. Let’s back up a little. Devika came home with an intestinal parasite.. and we thought Maya might have picked it up. Not sure, could be that she had a virus and now is freaked out about using the toilet. She was quite ill all of last week (thus no time to blog). We will be testing her for the parasite in the next couple of days just to ensure there isn’t an issue. Picked up the lovely testing materials yesterday at the doc’s. We already tested Devika and luckily only one of the intestinal issues the doc anticipated has proven positive. She has taken meds for several days and should be feeling better. Unfortunately, her tummy issues seem to be worsening and she has developed eczema rash all over her body and a low fever (plus her never-ending nasal congestion). Maybe the tummy issues are from a major change of diet.. hopefully. Today is the last day of her intestinal medicine – so I hope it worked.

We are hoping that this parasite turns out to be the issue with Devika’s small size. She is tiny!! Only 12 lbs and 24”. The pediatrician is very concerned with her lack of growth over the past year. She put Devika on a hi-cal diet and will be re-evaluating her on Nov 6^th – hoping to see growth.

We are also concerned about some oral issues that Devika has. She has a high palate with a bit of a groove in it. She also has a cross-bite (teeth don’t line up). We found out that these issues are a result of her prematurity (she was ~2 months premature). We hope that there is something that can be done to help this – that she won’t need to wait until she is old enough for braces. I’m assuming something more will be done, as she cannot even eat anything remotely solid yet. Even cheerios or small banana bits will choke her. She also is having some issues eating from a spoon – she doesn’t quite know how to do it. She is being fed as if she was 6 months old – everything is pureed. Food tends to get stuck in the palate groove if she has anything solid. We may be looking at some feeding therapy.. we’ll find out more at our next doc appmt.

Btw, we about had heart failure when we first met Devika. We did not know that she had the oral issues, and when we picked her up she became traumatized and lost some muscle control (totally normal). This caused her face to slack somewhat, and her mouth looked very odd. We were sooo afraid that something very major was wrong with her. We were, of course, quite stressed with the entire process of picking up a new baby – and dealing with our toddler at the same time – which did not help our transition with her. We freaked out a little and were worried about worse-case scenarios. Now that we are home and she is adjusting.. she has gained muscle control and the mouth does not look so obviously misshapen. Not sure you would even notice it unless you spent time with her or fed her.

So just take note – if you are picking up a child and see something like this – don’t freak out at first! J Yeah right… I think anyone would. But things are rarely as serious as you first think when you are looking at a completely traumatized child. It’s amazing how much they change after they begin to transition/gain strength/etc.

We’re looking forward to finding more info about how her palate and jaw might be corrected.. her pediatrician wanted to scope out the growth issue first. Maybe we will know more on Nov. 6^th at the next appmt.

So here we are 8 days after arriving home. We are VERY happy to be home. Maya had many transition issues, and is still working thru them (as is normal but painful!). When Devika cries, she cries. She will not be quiet until D is quiet.. so we have to remove her from the situation. Our ‘Love and Logic’ parenting techniques are occasionally forgotten.. but we’re trying hard to stick to them. We feel like we are tested at least 100x per day!

Luckily, D is not crying much lately. She has transformed from uber-cranky baby to semi-happy baby! YAY! We were a little worried about her temperament also – but maybe (and I would assume) the intestinal issue had caused her to be less-than-joyful for quite some time. She laughs and plays a lot now.. and is just adorable! She still doesn’t feel 100%.. so hopefully this will continue to improve.

Yesterday was quite a big step for us – D actually smiled at ME when I picked her up in the morning after waking! Yay! She was very attached to Daddy from day 1.. but has slowly warmed up to me. She will hold her arms out to me now when he is holding her.. and she will usually not jump out of my arms when she sees him. Things are slowly progressing!

D is also super-strong!! It is really insane. I call her my little SuperGirl. We’re pretty sure she is a baby super hero. Have you seen the baby on The Incredibles? Well.. she’s pretty close. I think she just might need a cape! No one at the doc offices/Childrens Hospital (blood draw lab)/etc have believed us.. until they witnessed it. She can fight off everyone! When she had her blood draws at the hospital, it took 4 techs plus Ajay.. and 1 ½ hrs.. to get the job done. Yikes.

Today I gave her a bath and she fought me the ENTIRE time. We sit with her in the tub, and usually both of us team up – Ajay holds her and I wash her. Today I thought I’d practice going it alone. Hmm.. not a fun experience to say the least. I would not have been the least bit surprised to have seen her head spin around and pea soup to fly out of her mouth!!

D hates to have her hair washed..or combed..or touched. Maybe the flaking scalp doesn’t feel good (major flaking issues even after several hair washes). She twisted her little body around in circles the entire time I bathed her. A couple of times I was able to wedge her into one spot by using my arms and legs to hold her down – so I could rinse her hair. Criminy!

Devika is, however, doing very well developmentally – her gross motor skills are awesome! She is crawling like a banshee, and she cruises around the entire house. I saw her take 3! steps on her own yesterday, and Aj saw her take several on her own today. I think she will be walking in a matter of days/weeks. Ack!!!

I knew that we were in for a completely different baby than Maya was – she was sooo easy and calm. Good thing I braced myself for this, b/c D is a total 180!

Here are a few things about Devika that I want to remember:

* D loves to play with her shadow in the morning – as long as the sunlight isn’t too bright. She squeals with delight and hops on her hands/knees onto her shadow – over and over. It is so cute! I must videotape this..

* D enjoys teething toys – she is getting at least one new tooth right now (probably part of the temperament issues). She likes to play with blocks – taking them out of the ‘block bag’ is wildly entertaining. She has discovered the Tupperware – luvs to chew on it and bang it against anything, including her head (though the head-banging is slowing down thank goodness).

* D is so small that the best fitting clothing are size 3-6 month from the Gap. Luv Gap clothing for these kids b/c they are made for thinner kiddos and don’t hang like tents off of them. The Hartstring outfits that I purchased in size 6-9 months are wearable but still too large. They are one pieces and she gets her legs caught up in them (both legs end up in one pantleg or in the body). She also wears size 2 ½ shoes. I need to order some, as I have only found one pair at Stride Rite.. and they weren’t cute. And I’m all about shoes. J She needs the sturdy white type to help her walk, but they don’t start until size 3.

* D loves to be tickled, and loves to be tossed (don’t worry – we don’t actually let go of her!) into the air. This always brings a big laugh!

* D is much more into cereal/mashed foods than her bottle right now. Might be b/c she has a stuffy nose. I hope we aren’t dealing with another non-drinker like Maya – yikes! She also cannot drink from a ‘4’ nipple.. she needs a ‘2’. I, of course, only had two ‘2’s in the house and 20 ‘4’s. And I keep forgetting them at the store. Argh.

* Maya calls D her baby. J She likes her until D cries and steals attention. Or when D plays with her toys. Or Ds toys. Or anything. Ahh… sibling rivalry! Gotta luv it.

So I have some last thoughts about our India trip, but haven’t had a chance to post them. I’ll do it in a later post along with some photos. Just need to find a few moments to edit them. Finding time while kids are sleeping and I’m not exhausted or frantically trying to clean the house (which seems to look like crap again 5 minutes later – what is UP with that??) – is proving to be a challenge.

I just keep thinking about our drive to the airport on Friday night, and the people who were sleeping in the median of the highways. Or roadways. Whatever. The roads are chaotic and crazy 24/7.. so just imagine rows of people - men/women/children - sleeping in the narrow median when all of this is going on! WOW. Kinda humbles you a bit.

To end this post, let me please remind all of you - VOTE!!! I have my mail-in ballot waiting for me. That will be tonite’s task. Can’t wait!

2 Babies

2008-10-16T09:37:00.004-07:00

Not sure how I can find time to blog ever again.. haha! :) Life has become very hectic in the past 24+ hrs! Frankly the biggest issue right now is Maya.. wanting to be the baby and being very very very needy (normal I know.. just painful!). Devika also wants to be the baby (haha).. but her high-maintenance-ness is to be expected. She is doing pretty well - still wants to be touching Daddy, if he is within sight. If not, she seems pretty happy with me. Not that there is any other choice.. ;) She is crawling, pulling herself up, and starting to laugh and play a little.

She gets very sad on occasion, which just breaks my heart. You can see it in her face and her little tiny eyes. When she wakes, she is still disoriented and then begins grieving again. Soo heart-breaking. I hate this transition period, it just hurts. You can't do anything but hold them and try to love them through it. I'm very glad that she latched on to Ajay. She is eating/pooping/sleeping.. so I think we can get her home in one piece!

She finally is sleeping for the night (I hope).. so I'm going to go try to get some sleep. We've had visa processing issues (the cable was never sent from Delhi and it FINALLY arrived at ~5 pm today after about 20 calls and emails from us, Dillon, and the Kolkata embassy) and spent some unnecessary time at the Embassy today. Tomorrow we will be there at 9 am, however, and will leave with her visa in-hand. PHEW. We really thought, most of today, that we would not be flying home tomorrow night as intended. THAT is a relief. I have to get away from this indian food.. i won't fit into my clothing for the ride home.. ;)

Update: WE HAVE THE VISA!! We went to the Embassy this morning and were given the golden packet! Yay!! USA here we come... we leave our hotel at 9 pm tonite to begin the long journey home. Can't wait! :))
Here's another glimpse of our sweetie:

And Suddenly There Were Four..

2008-10-15T05:55:00.003-07:00

Wow.. here we are!! And no, you aren't seeing any really good photos. Arrrrgh! The stupid battery charger for our point-n-shoot small camera doesn't work! And the battery died immediately before we left for ISRC. Don't freak out - I have photos - but they are in my pro camera, and won't be uploaded until we return to the US. Blaaaah.

The photos here were actually in videos that I was able to 'snap' photos from. sigh. Always a technical issue, I swear. Last time, when we picked up Maya, our video cam ran out of batteries immediately. Thankfully it stayed alive during our entire visit today.

Anyhow- tech issues aside, we have our baby!!!! :))))))) She is amazing! Adorable and tiny and beautiful!

We picked her up today ~2 pm, and have since been hanging in our hotel room. She has eaten - some formula, some rice/yogurt mix, some cheerios, some Gerber puffs. Pretty healthy appetite so far, which I find surprising. I hope this keeps up and the trauma doesn't kick in and take it away.

So far, she is only allowing Ajay to hold her. She threw a HUGE fit going to him and going to me at the orphanage. This was no shock - she is an older baby and very attached to her Ayahs. Eventually she settled in with Ajay, and I haven't tried to remove her. I did take and feed her a bit.. but then gave her back. She's comfy enough now to smile and coo at me.. but I'm not trying to pick her up yet. She's happy snuggling into Daddy's tummy. :))

She is starting to warm up to Maya also. Maya was very in-her-face.. and still is, tho we try to keep her back a little. She wants soo badly to hold and play with the baby. She doesn't fully understand (of course). Devika is beginning to interact a little with her now, so I'm sure they will transition quickly.

Maya was horrid at ISRC. I had hoped for the best, but she really was flipped out. She wanted to climb into the cribs, and when she wasn't allowed to, she threw fits the entire time. She got very upset when I held Devika and wanted to be held from that point forward. We're still working with that issue (feeding, diapers, etc).. but slowly things are improving. Well.. I'll tell myself they are imporovingI'm sure it will take a lot of time to move past this.. but it's normal.

Ok gotta run. I want to go stare at this little angel some more! Still cannot believe she is finally with us!!

More at a later time. We have to do the visa thing tomorrow, so no idea when I'll have a chance to write more. Hopefully not too long.

Last Moments as 3

2008-10-14T18:12:00.005-07:00

The world is round,

and the place which may seem like the end,

may also be the beginning.

--- Ivy Baker Priest

Here we are in Kolkata.. coming to you from a non-smoking room that smells like a cigarette butt. Sigh.. what can you do! Anyhow, we are here and the excitement is mounting!

Maya spent most of the plane ride yesterday bouncing around in her seat talking exuberantly about her new sister. :) {Aka.. she did not sleep allll day until the moment our driver pulled us up at the hotel entrance!}

A little baby toddled over to play with maya in the airport earlier that day, and she had so much fun! She is def. in big sister mode. She was super- sweet.. didn't get upset or smack at the child when it played with her beloved stroller and kept smacking at maya's nose. I was most pleasantly relieved by this!!

We flew Kingfisher airlines, btw, for those who are planning their travel. It was a much better experience for us than Jet was a couple yrs ago. Jet might be better now also - and they were not bad, they are the #1 airline in India for good reason - just not as accomodating at that time. Kingfisher has their own porters and are very helpful thru your entire airport saga. And sometimes it IS a saga.. so think about this. On the flight TO Goa, they had no record of our reservation, but they worked with us quickly and efficiently. Anyhow - last trip the airports were on the top of my 'worst part of the trip' list, and this time they are at the bottom. The planes are also new and nice - and tv screens on every seat. They feed you way too much also. Still having some heartburn, 12 hrs later.
Can't forget the landings on the return flight either (we had to stop in Mumbai on the way to Kolkata).. bounce - bounce - bounce. It was lovely. NOT.

So now we wait until it is time to call Anju and schedule our visit to ISRC!! We rec'd a couple updated Devika photos yesterday (Satarupa..I need to get into the mode of calling her that for awhile until she is used to the transition..yikes) - and again she was not smiling. :( We have only rec'd one photo where she was slightly smiling.. the rest have not looked very happy. I'm praying that this is an odd coincidence and that she really is not an unhappy child. Poor little whoo - she just needs her family! Thank god we are almost there. And thank god our first child was super-happy and helped us thru our 'first-time parents' mode! Maya was SUCH an easy baby - I know we are in for something more challenging this time.. my parents have always told me that paybacks are hell.. haahaa!
No worries though, seriously. I don't care what her personality is.. I love her to bits already! Can't wait to hold her in my arms.
Update: we are scheduled to be at ISRC at 2 pm. ACK! Leaving right now! :)))

Side note ~ my mom rec'd some not-so-happy news today from a recent head MRI. Please, please pray for her health and strength. Mom, if you are reading this - we're thinking about you and keeping you in our prayers. This is def. the place to pray - prayer is part of every moment of life it seems in this country. I can actually hear someone outside singing prayers (bhajans) right now.

The Crow.. and other travel bits

2008-10-13T10:01:00.002-07:00

Thought I would start this post by throwing in a review of the Park Hyatt resort – in the event that anyone out there might be considering a visit. I’ve already mentioned that it is a fabulously-beautiful resort, and this is very true. It also is worth mentioning that the service is impeccable. Anything you need, you only need ask (and often, it seems that they read your mind – or have amazing ears and can hear you discussing something from several feet away and instantly materialize with whatever it is that you were considering a request for). From the moment you arrive and are handed a refreshing drink of coconut milk – still encased in the chopped-open coconut – you feel catered-to.
The rooms, while amazing, might not be comfortable for travelers who are not ‘close’. The bathroom is separated from the main room via sliding wood-slatted doors. While you cannot see through the wood slats (unless you are my 3-yr old and you crouch down while bending your head at a quite flexible angle in order to frighten anyone inside with only your sparkling black eyes seen peering through a slit), they don’t block much (any) sound. It is not easy to bathe, wash out clothing, etc while someone is napping.
The tub is hands-down one of my favorite things about the resort. It is sunken into the marble bath floor (and is also marble). There are 2 steps leading into it.. and it is ~5’ x 5’. In a large dish, a supply of honey-suckle smelling orange-color flower petals is kept heaping. It is easy to pour yourself a bath worthy of the most luxurious spa.. and someone from the staff here would likely be more than happy to have one poured for you if you found it too much trouble. :)
One other note regarding the fab tub: it is located in the center of the bathroom.. and the waterfall shower rains down into it. This means that if you are looking for a private bathing experience.. you aren’t going to get it here. Especially if you are traveling with a small child who never leaves your side! The doors do not lock btw.
I believe I had read a review prior to visiting this hotel stating that a few of the rooms actually have the shower detached.. but I don’t know. There is no ‘shower door’. And one wall of the shower is glass – shuttered on the outside by wood slats and a circle design at the top. This allows privacy (believe me – I’ve scoped every angle from within the room and it seems to be private!).. while giving you the feeling of bathing outdoors in the midst of the rainforest.
The toilet is located in a separate toilet area, with a slatted door, but is inside the bathroom. If you aren’t close-knit travelers, you might not want to share the bath while getting ready in the mornings/evenings.

The food at the hotel is great – the café has an extensive breakfast buffet (also surprisingly affordable) with ~20 different fresh breads/rolls/muffins/etc, fresh fruit, and any egg/pancake/French toast/etc item made-to-order upon request. I’m really going to miss this – I don’t think my cold cereal is quite going to rival it!

I mentioned the crows in the blog post title b/c they are very aggressive here. We encountered one yesterday that had his eye on Maya! He kept following us.. swooped at her once.. and then perched on her pool chaise and stared at her. She thought this was pretty cool and started to reach towards the ‘birdy friend’.. while I yelled and smacked at him. The crazy thing didn’t fly away until I literally pounded the chair next to him! Hmm. I’m guessing she must have been carrying some breakfast crumbs on her clothing or something.. ?! Yipes!

So today we ventured out of the resort!
Thank god that I remembered my motion-sickness pills. Someone (no names mentioned..) was making fun of me when we started out on our journey.. but an hour and many screeching-tire-hairpin-turns-into a barrage of oncoming trucks/buses/mopeds later.. the jokes had ended!
I’m pretty sure that I have 30 or 40 new grey hairs.. or maybe the color could more aptly be described as shocked-white. The India driving really doesn’t normally scare me much – I somehow just ‘let go’ and do not look out the front windshield during the rides. But today I was expecting less craziness – we had been told that this area is much more tame than the Delhi area. I BEG to differ. Very narrow roads and faster speeds. Even Maya gasped out loud several times when viewing an oncoming bus that looked to be driving almost on top of us.

We checked out a fort – which was disappointing after the amazing forts and other sites we had seen in the Delhi/Agra area (but like I told Aj.. we seriously cannot compare ANYTHING in the world to the Taj Mahal now can we?? We've been spoiled!). The views of the Arabian Sea were quite phenomenal from the walls that we climbed onto, however. Just, again, so hot that we did not feel like lingering.

We drove into Old Goa and visited the Basilica of the Born Jesus. This church houses the body of Saint Francis Xavier. His body has not decomposed.. and was not embalmed. I think that is so amazing. My mom had recently been telling me of some saints which were entombed in Rome which also had not decomposed.. so interesting! His body is displayed every 10 years, with the next being 2014. I guess thousands and thousands of people come to see him from around the world. I would luv to see that.. but could not even begin to imagine the crowds and insanity.
We drove past a large convent which housed an order of Franciscan nuns. I snapped a quick photo, but we did not visit. I would have liked to stop – but Maya was literally melting down at this point, and we were all tired/hungry/sweltering. There is a story of that convent, but I didn’t quite understand what the driver was saying. I’ll have to scope it out and pass it along to my sister (also a francisan sister). (sorry we missed it Mary.. I was trying..)

That pretty much made up our day! We had hoped to do more, but we were just too dragged down by the heat. We will have to revisit in a few years at a better time of year. We did see the outside of the estate where the owner of Kingfisher lives. Kingfisher – the beer, airline, etc. Looked quite massive.
We stopped at a chemist today and were able to purchase Lactogen formula for Devika, as well as vanilla Pediasure. Hopefully she will eat for us!! We are getting sooo excited!! We fly out tomorrow, early afternoon .. to Kolkata. YAY!!
Aj is getting very nervous.. but so far, I am only excited. I guess we’ve been down this road before and I feel pretty well prepared. Or I’m just in a state of denial. :)
Maya has now regressed into ‘baby’ mode as much as she can get away with. She wants everything that is Devika’s.. the clothing, bottles, etcetc.. She wants to be held all the time.. fed.. etc. We understand what is happening and are not pushing her. I know this is a hard time for her and we’re working hard to give her attention and comfort. She is going to be a great big sister!! The next few days are going to be difficult – especially Thursday, when Aj has to work for ~4/5 hours at the Kolkata office and leave me with the girls. Oh well.. one step at a time.
Btw – Mary – I finished the book I was into (Twilight series, book II for anyone out there who is also into that series – luv it!!).. and am well into The Shack. It is very interesting.. it’s at a point now where I have to read slowly and try to ingest! I hope to finish before Devika joins us, but not sure that I will. Good recommendation, we’ll have to chat about it after I’m home.
Next post will be from Kolkata!!! 36 Hours (approx) before we are a family of 4!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Here we come baby!

Hotter Than...

2008-10-12T03:20:00.004-07:00

Omg it is HOT here in Goa. And HUMID. Ok that is nothing new in India.. but I forgot the immensity of the heat. Maybe it is worse for us because we live in a desert region and have no humidity. Then again, I think it's just dam hot. Even the Indians that we have met here are in agreement. The heat index has been b/t 105 - 110 the last couple of days.

We stayed out by the ocean for maybe an hour yesterday.. and I think I got a bit dehydrated. I kept worrying about Maya, but obviously forgot to keep myself totally hydrated. I've been dealing with mega stomach pain today, and I'm assuming it was the heat. Can't spend much time outside today, as it is again - so intense. We spent quite a bit of time at the pool in the early morning hours, and then retreated to the AC! Now I'm trying to talk myself into taking my malaria drugs. They make me super-dizzy, and I'm getting very sick of feeling like I'm walking on a moving ship for a couple hours post-pill. I think this happened the last time we came to India, and we both stopped taking the pills. Not sure we can rationalize NOT taking them this time, as the mosquitos are definitely biting. Blech.

So Goa sounds fun eh? Haa.. it is actually fantastic. We're still loving the beauty and relaxation. Tomorrow we are finally going to hire a driver and leave the resort for a few hours. Had planned to do this today.. but alas, my stomach refuses to leave the resort.

We're planning to explore Old Goa.. and maybe another beach or two. We've heard that the entire area is breathtaking, so we can't miss seeing it. There are some temples and churches I'd love to see in Old Goa.. but we'll have to ensure that it is safe. I've read stories in the newspaper the past few days regarding protests and issues at both the temples and the churches. We'll have to see how it goes.

Maya is still having a wonderful time. She has met some little 'friends' at the pool today. :) She is quite social, and tends to startle the Indian families by walking up to them and starting conversations. She gets that from her father though, as he has startled a few people himself (women mostly.. they obv are not used to being spoken to by strange men..haha)!

We met a couple of very nice Indian families today - one of which is from Kolkata and has an adopted daughter from one of the Kolkata orphanages! They even visited ISRC at one point. According to them, Kolkata only has 3 orphanages that are 'safe' to adopt from. It was very interesting to hear them describe their domestic-India adoption process. They thought that their wait for their daughter was long.. until they heard that Devika is 14 months and their daughter was 40 days old at the time of coming home!

It will be interesting to transition from Goa to Kolkata. So far this trip is definitely nothing like the last trip. Even the traffic and towns nearby are nothing like 'normal India'. We are constantly reminded of the (bizarre to us) class issue in this country, though. We've witnessed some rude scenes between some Indian families and their servants that they have brought with them. It is such a foreign concept to us. I seriously feel almost like we're on an old plantation with slaves. For one thing - the grounds remind me of a huge plantation.. and the groundskeepers wear dark overalls with white t-shirts and straw hats. Pair that with an Indian man yelling at a servant/nanny/Ayah/whatever.. for not seeing that his child was climbing on a balcony fence (directly in front of HIM btw) b/c she was busy with laundry.. etc. It's an interesting glimpse of a very different culture.

Speaking of which.. the stories in the newspaper are almost mindblowing. Yesterday I read about a village woman who was admitted to a hospital due to severe burns on her hands. She was accused of being a witch by someone in her village.. and their 'test' was to make her grab a silver coin from a boiling pot of oil. If she was burned - she was a witch, if not burned - she was not a witch. Hmmmm.

Anyhow- Sorry, no exciting photos today! I've been using my pro camera, and I shoot RAW images, which are not upload-able into the laptop I'm using. Hopefully I'll have a few interesting snaps from Old Goa tomorrow.

Until then..

2008-10-09T22:48:00.001-07:00

A few photos ~

Hello Goa!

2008-10-09T19:34:00.002-07:00

This is just a very quick post to let those of you who are following closely (such as my worried family) - that we are fine! We traveled to Goa yesterday, and were still fighting off major jet-lag. It is definitely much more difficult to recoup from jet-lag when you have a 3 yr old who cannot take sleeping pills!! And no, Benadryl has the opposite effect on her. So anyhow - we finally had a full night's sleep last night and I think that maybe possibly we are ok today.
We're off to breakfast and to explore this amazingly beautiful resort and area. We are at the Park Hyatt, and it has not disappointed so far. The room is very large - would pass for a small suite in most hotels.. and Maya loves the sunken tub. I am NOT loving the mosquitos and other random bizarre bugs I've found and killed in the room this morning.. but I'm trying not to think about that. Trying to concentrate on the beautiful lagoon and palm trees that our room and deck overhang.
I'll hopefully blog again later with a couple of photos. Internet connectivity is hideously expensive here, so we won't be blogging daily (don't get worried if I miss a day!).
Also - things are well in motion for us to pick up Devika next week. All is well. Time for some zen-ing out in Goa. :)

I AM AN AMERICAN CITIZEN!!!

2008-10-08T01:51:00.002-07:00

First of all - here we are in Delhi - yay!! So close to picking up our baby! It's almost hard to believe.

Ah, but it has not been a fun day. Yesterday we spent 6 hours napping.. and then a little time in the pool and hanging in the hotel room. Today was Embassy day.
So here is my rant-of-the-day (hopefully not going to be a trend during this trip!):

I am American. I look stereo-typical 'American' (I almost glow for gods sake).. I have an American accent.. I have a United States of America passport with MY name on it. I AM AN AMERICAN CITIZEN!!!
Is it too much to expect to be treated like an American at the dam United States Embassy???
For those readers out there who will be traveling to India to pick up your child in the near future.. please read on and do not make our stupid mistake:

We arrived at the Embassy and were told to go through line 5. We take line 5, which is empty of other persons.. and walk to the main guard area. We're told that our needs mean that we must stand throught the 'homeland security' line and must go to line 4. Soo.. we walk back to line 4 and get in line. It is a short line - only one Indian family and one lone Indian man in front of us. And then.. we wait. And wait. It's hot.. it's humid.. we have a slowly-melting-down 3 yr old with us. I realize that I stupidly forgot to pull my long hair back into a pony. Uh oh. This cannot be good.

Finally after ~an hour, a guard comes out and walks up to me to find out what my needs are (I'm white.. no one else in line is light-skinned). He takes our info and then asks us to follow him. We do not enter the main Embassy bldg (which we sat in for hours during Maya's process).. we follow him to another bldg where CIS is housed. We wait in that bldg for ~20/30 minutes and then have our visa interview. It goes quickly and the man is very nice.. so no issues there.
We do, however, make a mistake at this point. We are too busy with the I-600 details to inquire as to whether we may use the telephone. We need to telephone our driver to alert him that we are finished and need to be picked up.
After our interview, the guard escorts us outside. Just as we are leaving, we recall that we forgot the phone call. We ask him if we can use a phone. He tells us we must go to the main bldg. We set off on our way, not worried - as we used the phone in the main bldg the last time we went thru this process and know where it is located, etc. We again go thru security and explain to ~5 guards what our need is. We are sent thru line 5 to the main bldg guards. And there.. they refuse to allow us into the Embassy. 4 guards reiterate over and over that there IS NO PHONE on the premises and we must use a public phone. The public phone is ~1 mile away.
We leave and start walking. Suddenly we think - what are we doing! This is not safe (the traffic is just plain scary).. I am holding a half-asleep and very cranky toddler in my arms.. it is darn hot.. and it's so humid that my hair, which I forgot to pull back, is 5x it's normal size!
We return to the Embassy. Again, we explain to 5 guards in the first security-check area what we are doing.. and then again to the 4 guards at the main building entry. And again.. they refuse us entry. One of the 'nice' guards gives us rupees to use the pay phone and they shuttle us out of the bldg.
I think we were so appalled by this process that we did not know how to react (and they had very large guns... haha). We start walking again.
After we walk ~50' down the road we become irrate. WHAT IS GOING ON! Yes they do have a phone! If not in the main bldg anymore, they can let us back in to the CIS area where we KNOW they have an outside phone line. It is not like we were not there filing paperwork.. we are not just visiting the embassy to USE THE PHONE!! They ALL knew who we were and what we were doing! This is ridiculous.
Plus my hair now has possibly grown it's OWN hair.. and the strands that aren't huge and creating a waft around my head, are now stuck to my neck and generating an unsafe amount of heat.
We stalked back to the embassy.. AGAIN explained to the guards.. who sent us through to the main bldg AGAIN.. and this time we were NOT leaving. We refused to leave when they tried to prod us back out the door.. and finally we wore them down. They made us promise not to tell anyone outside the bldg that there was a phone on the premises (like they would simply open the doors for someone else??).. and they finally let us into the main bldg, where we went directly to American Citizen Services and used the phone.
Um.. yes.. that's right. Needless to say, we were sooo irritated, overheated, and just plain mean by the time the driver picked us up.. that our day was pretty ruined. I could barely hold up my hair.
We ate a little food and now the rest of the fam is sleeping while I blog and consider raiding the mini-bar for something with a calming effect. arrrrrrgh.
So if you will be going thru this process yourselves - do NOT forget to use the phone when you are in the building! Lesson learned.

Anyhow.. let's backtrack a tiny bit. We have been a little concerned about this trip due to all of the bombings that have been going on around Delhi and other areas in India. We decided that we would stay away from touristy areas if possible, other than the beaches of Goa. The terrorists seem to be going after markets and temples (these are not anti-American bombings).. so we will try to avoid these areas.

So, keeping this in mind, we wake up in San Fran prior to our flight - and there is a HUGE amount of people protesting outside of our hotel. We leave for the airport early (b/c I'm paranoid).. and end up getting delayed b/c there are a zillion people, press, and security officials everyplace. Turns out that Sarah Palin was speaking at our hotel and was arriving at that moment. Luckily we were not delayed too long.. and did make it to the airport on time (obviously!). Yikes!

Our flight(s) were great. Maya was an amazing traveler!! She slept quite a bit, and was happy most of the time. I was very impressed! The flights (we stopped in Seoul and Singapore) were pretty calm - other than some storms around the Kolkata area. I think I may have been the only person besides the staff who was awake during that time. ..I assume they were awake.. ;) Actually I was impressed that the pilot alerted us (ok.. me).. that we were unable to avoid all of the weather and to prepare for some bumps. He came on the speaker twice to do that. Thank GOD.. as I am a very fearful flyer and it helped me to deal.

Our layovers were only ~15 minutes each and were timed perfectly! Singapore's 777-300ER planes had awesome entertainment setups even in economy - on-demand movies (a ton of them)/tv/music/video games on a 10.6" personal screen. This helped the time go by in an amazing way. Maya loved playing with the 'memote'.. tho I had to watch her, as it was also a telephone. We don't need any $100 phone call bills coming in from the plane!

We lost our stroller at one point. We were in such a hurry when we changed planes in Singapore, that we forgot to grab it before we left. Luckily (LUV Singapore Air!).. they worked hard to locate it for us once we arrived in India and realized what happened, and they called last night to let us know that they had located it. They offered to deliver it ~midnight last night.. but we told them that they could just please deliver it to our hotel today instead! Great service!

Our hotel in Delhi is fabulous also - the ITC Maurya. I'll try to get some pics later or tomorrow morning. There is quite a bit of art in the lobby by a famous Indian artist (sorry, I just forgot his name). The building itself is modeled after a Buddhist stupa (the architecture rises up in steps). The lobby recreates a Buddhist hall of worship - it is a panelled dome - which is painted with an absolutely amazing mural. I cannot adequately describe it - I must snap some photos. Stunning. The rooms are very nice also. Not too large, but very well decorated - trendy. I luv the waterfall showerhead!

Maya is doing pretty well. She did a great job of embarressing us at the Embassy. ;) I'm sure there were many Indians who were discussing the obviously Americanized little Indian girl. Sigh. She wasn't bad.. but she wasn't motionless and silent like all the Indian children who were in the area. I think she appalled many people by trying to 'take their order' .. and trying to share her stickers. :) Ahh.. endless entertainment! She unfortunately doesn't like any of the food so far - which has been a slight issue. Luckily she has eaten fruit and yogurt.. so she is not too famished! I think that the main issue is simply the travel and then our unhappy and hot morning. She kept begging me to take her 'to the hotel so we can warm up please?!'. Haa.. she keeps getting her hot/cold adjectives confused. ;) But she is having fun playing with her new toys in the hotel room. I had wrapped up a bunch of them for the plane, but she only needed to unwrap ~3. She kept herself busy! She also likes the pool at this hotel - it has a very large children's wading area.

Ok.. long post! Hope you don't mind skimming for interesting info.. I want to document all of our travel details in order to remember them in the future!

On to Goa in the morning. BRING ON THE BEACH!!!!!!!!!!

On Our Way!

2008-10-05T08:24:00.002-07:00

We're finally on our way! We are currently in San Fran - waiting to catch the big plane to India early this afternoon. After a couple of flight delays, we finally arrived here yesterday evening. Maya had a great time on the flight.. but of course did not sleep until we were taxiing into the airport. Needless to say, our hopes of doing something touristy in San Fran were squelched. We only had time for dinner before Maya definitely needed to go to sleep.
Hopefully the next flight(s) will be as easy for Maya as the first was. I haven't dipped into the 'bag 'o presents' yet, so that should help. Wish us luck! See you on the other side of the world! :)

Let The Countdown Begin!

2008-09-30T10:19:00.004-07:00

Oh my gosh, we are traveling in 4 days!!! YES, that's right - 4! days from today!! We will fly to California, where we will spend Saturday night, and then climb onto that lovely Singapore Airlines jet on Sunday! ACK!
Now the questions that everyone has started to ask - are you ready? Have you finished packing? Are you nervous/excited? freaking out?
And the answers are: yes/no, no, no/yes. YES.
Immunizations finished (flu shots coming in next 2 days). Malaria drugs begun (for Maya). Medical/toiletry/bug repellant/clothing/contact lenses/etc purchased and piled up. Entertaining toys/games have been purchased, wrapped (it will be a mini-Xmas!), and packed in carry-ons for Maya (hidden away so not even the new 'Thomas the Train' carry-on is seen until the day of travel!). Baby items have been purchased and cleaned. Toy room has been re-organized (gotta think safety for mobile 1-yr old) and age-appropriate toys sanitized. Co-sleeper set up. House has been baby-proofed. Clothing is in piles to be selected and packed. Suitcases are waiting to be filled. Housesitter moving in this weekend. Dog moving out this weekend (thank you Uncle Keith/Auntie LuAnn!!). Work items are close-to-complete. Schedules are cleared. Paperwork is almost complete, and nicely filed in color-coded folders.
Flights are booked/Hotels are booked.
P H E W.
Thankfully I get to have an evening out with the ladies tonite. Book club (aka, 'fab excuse for babysitter and wine') fell at the perfect time this month. Much needed!
We are all very excited though. Maya wakes up every day and asks if today is the day that she will go in the 'big huge airplane to India to get Devika'. We cannot wait to meet our baby!! Devika - we will see you very soon!! I can't believe that we are finally almost there!!

The Final Countdown! {haa.. these guys are more excited than we are..}

2008-09-24T21:10:00.005-07:00

So this is a new spin on the 'ole 'Tupperware' or 'Pampered Chef' party. Someone in my neighborhood held a 'Baubles and Botox' party last night. Yes.. that's right.. I said 'Botox'. No joke - they had jewelry for sale, free cocktails, and a doctor there who did Botox injections. No, I do not live in Orange County, CA. And no, I did not attend. Can you see it? My hubby arrives home from work-travel, and finds me completely expressionless. :)) He'd think he walked into a scene from The Stepford Wives! What a disappointment THAT would be.. lol! Ok, maybe I exaggerate.. but that was the first time I've heard of that. Of course, I guess since there are actually cartoons about this type of thing, it must be relatively common. Go figure!

Some exciting news today! Found out that things are moving along well with the passport process, so we are planning to book travel. Our agency suggests that we wait until the passport has been issued, but we actually would not have any issues staying in Kolkata a bit longer if there was a bit of a delay (hubby has business partners located there) - so we are going to just go! Yay!
We're waiting to make sure that our legals reach our agency here in the US and that everything looks good, which should happen in the next 2-3 biz days. At that point, we will book! Our plan is to leave on October 6th and stay through the 20th or 21st. Need to nail down the departure date. We found great-priced tix thru Singapore - all 3 of us (I'm including Maya, not Devika) can travel for ~$4200. Not bad eh? Gotta luv their web fares.
I can't believe that we are actually to this point!! After all the waiting, we are finally to the very last leg. Wow. We have people set up to house-sit and dog-sit.. so everything is falling into place.
My big concern at this point is getting Maya thru this ungodly flight. I have purchased many little busy-items.. and will be wrapping them up like little presents. I'll then distribute them over time. I am very excited about the 'Chicken Socks' brand books that I purchased for her. I purchased 4 of them - they look great! One is all about fun with tape, and it comes with little rolls of tape. Another is fun with felt - and has felt pages and a bunch of felt pieces that you put together to make little animals on the pages, etc. Def. a cute idea. I hope and pray that this works! I think that it will. If it gets ugly, I'll let her 'braid' my hair. She's very into braids right now (tho she can't actually braid yet - but she tries!). This is last resort, as I might have issues getting into Delhi looking like this:

And I thought they stared last time - when I was just light-skinned and blonde. :D

Everywhere Goa

2008-09-23T19:51:00.004-07:00

First of all, let me clarify: we are NOT flying biz class to India. {sniffle sniffle} Plain 'ole economy seats. Unless, of course, anyone wants to donate to my 'suite-seat' fund. ;)

I'm a bit wierded out right now. Recall that we are going to stay a few days in Goa while we are traveling? Well.. yesterday I got my latest issue of Conde Nast Traveler, and their cover article is about Goa! And then tonite, I turn on the Travel Channel (see a theme in my interests?).. and it's Andrew Zimmerman - in Goa! Straaaange. And very cool! Especially seeing actual video on Zimmerman's show. I hope that I get a chance to photograph the markets that he visited - would make for some great travel photography! The fruits and spices are gorgeous. The pork sausages, however, might ruin the entire trip for Aj. ;) Anyone who knows him will understand what I'm talking about! The boy will not touch a piece of pork.
Umm.. pickled fish. Stays good for 1 yr with no refrigeration. Ahh.. looking forward to foraging thru the Goan food market! Hopefully it is actually open - as we are arriving at the tail end of the monsoon season. This could seriously impact our trip. I'm praying that it isn't too much of an influence. I did see that this week is sunny.. after a devastating 3 days of hideous monsoon rains last week. Yikes. They have had over 100" of rain this season! Coming from a very dry climate, this will be quite the change for us.
Btw, one of my 'goals' in life that I have managed to actually achieve every year for the past 7 years.. is to visit a hotel/resort/ship/etc. listed in Conde Nast as one of their Gold List winners. Looks like this year - it is the Park Hyatt Goa! Wait. I already had one this year. Hmm. Well, I guess that makes 2008 an amazing travel year - in SO very many ways! 2009 is going to be a major challenge!

So, speaking of monsoons.. I purchased Maya a raincoat today. Ooo Aaah.. I know this sounds exciting. What actually WAS exciting (only for me I'm sure) was the fact that I caved and also bought a matching outfit (to the raincoat of course) for her and a matching/coordinating dress for Devika. And a few more items for Devika. I'm no longer allowing myself near any mall or outlet mall or boutique or Target or store of any type where I might be tempted to 'just buy one little new item for little Devika'. I am cut-off. Done.

And speaking of Maya - she is doing SOO well at her new school!!! My little 'update sheet' from today said that she is fitting in very well with the class, and getting along great with the other kids. Using the potty... not hitting anyone.. eating all of her lunch.. WOW! I'm so very happy that I made the decision and pulled her out of the other school. She is also happier at home and sleeping very well at night (tho still getting up b/t 5-6 am - owch!). So, things are going very well and will hopefully be a comfort to her when we arrive back home from India.

And speaking of India and Devika.. we were blessed to receive some new photos of her yesterday! Unfortunately she was woken from a nap for the photos.. and she was obviously NOT happy! Look at the hair - is that not fabulous? I hope they don't cut it before we get there! What a sweetie.

Preparations and Celebrations

2008-09-19T13:15:00.003-07:00

Yesterday we rec'd an email from our agency saying that Devika/Satarupa's passport has been requested. The timeline given was '15 days'.. but we'll see. Hoping for less than 15, but that would not be hideous by any means. We jaunted up to the Global Travel immunization office and rec'd our shots and prescrips for the trip today! That just makes it feel so close! Maya was awesome - she intently watched Mommy and Daddy receive thier shots, and then took hers like such a big girl! Not a cry or anything! I was most impressed - as were the nurses. I could not believe, however, that she still weighed in at only 22 lbs. Criminy! She is completely healthy though, so I guess we can't complain.
We tentatively scheduled our hotel reservations in Goa yesterday. Thought we would go ahead and try to ensure that the Park Hyatt has availability when we are there. If the dates work out, we should be good to go. We also checked on flights, and looks like we can fly all of us via web fares for less than $5,000 total. I guess that means that I'm not going to be luxuriously flying on the top floor of the plane with a private sky-suite, complementary Givenchy-pajamas, a feather matteress and duvet, and a 23" personal tv. Seriously, what's up with that? I feel extremely deserving! And heck, Maya could just snuggle in with me.. no need for her own sky-suite. I think that is well worth $14,890, don't you? And think about how comfortable little Devika would be on the ride home! I would even let DH visit on occasion from the back of the plane.. ;)))
Maybe we could start a little fundraiser and raise the money for my suite experience. I promise to blog all about it DURING the flight!! :D
Oh, and by the way, for all who have inquired as to whether I'll be blogging during the trip - the answer is def. yes! That's the best way for me to keep everyone updated without writing a zillion emails.. and it also helps me to have a nice record of the experience for future input into Devika's lifebook/baby book.

The slideshow below contains some photos from Maya's 3rd birthday. We celebrated once with Dad, b/c he had to travel on her actual birthday - we rode the train downtown and had a fab lunch at McCormick & Schmick (yes, that might have been more for us.. haha!). We then celebrated again on her actual birthday, with friends. She had asked and asked for a Barney cake, and luckily she had one! Wasn't easy.. which I found odd. Who would guess that Barney cakes are not popular among the toddler crowd these days?? She LOVED her Thomas balloon.. it plays a VERY LOUD song and talks a little when you smack it. Needless to say, it kept getting jostled between the floral dept of the supermarket and my car.. and it sang/talked at 'airline-decibal' the entire way. I was quite a spectacle - juggling this HUGE balloon.. a cake.. and 6 other balloons! Thank god for large sunglasses. :))

A Valuable Resource

2008-09-10T15:35:00.002-07:00

I discovered a podcast recently thru itunes, and I really like it quite a bit. It's called Creating A Family: Talk About Adoption and Infertility'. The woman who produces the show - Dawn Davenport - is an attorney and an author. She has written "The Complete Book of International Adoption", if you have heard of it. And actually her podcasts are created from a blog talk radio show that she does.
Her September 3rd show was entitled 'The Connected Child', and is an interview with the woman who wrote the book by that name - Dr Karyn Purvis. I've read the book, and recently (ok, yesterday!) pulled the book off my bookshelf in order to brush-up on some attachment/bonding advice as well as behavior/discipline info. A bit of a coincidence to log onto itunes today and see this podcast link! It turned out to be an interesting and informative listen.
If you are an adoptive (or soon-to-be) parent, you might want to check out Dawn's website and listen to a few of the previous podcasts, etc. I only recently discovered her, and have only listened to 3 or 4 podcasts.. but they have all been interesting. There are a couple more that I noticed from the past that sound great - such as an interview with Mary Hopkins-Best, who authored "Toddler Adoption" - another highly-recommended book.
Dawn's website: http://www.creatingafamily.com. Click 'Radio Show' for links to stream previous shows.
You can also play her shows off of iTunes or BlogTalkRadio: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/creatingafamily.

In other news, I've made the final decision to pull Maya out of her current school. I am visiting other preschools again and looking for the right fit for her. I was referred by her teacher to another Montessori, so I will be checking that out tomorrow. Today I visited a Goddard School - but I tend to feel that is more of a childcare establishment than a preschool. Difficult to go from a true Montessori Elementary School to a childcare facility. Anyhow, the other Montessori has younger kids and smaller class sizes - so it sounds like a possibility. At least I've made a decision. Phew! Need to take care of this change prior to our travel, so it isn't a major issue when we return.
Hope all of you are having a lovely Wednesday! :)

Happiness Is..

2008-09-09T20:38:00.004-07:00

So I thought that since I am in a GREAT mood tonite, I should post a blog post eh? Seems like it is always easy to spew out all of my downer-thoughts.. but there are not as many 'up' posts. :)
To counter the recent depressing list-posts (and to keep you from recommending prescription anti-depressives), here are the things that I am most happy about today:
1) Duh. I think that if you have ever read this blog, you know what is #1. If you are new (and who is lurking out there from Iceland? I just noticed that one today..), simply scroll down to the timeline entitled 'We've Begun Our 2nd Journey..', note the timeline, and scroll back up here.
Ok, welcome back.
Now read the 2 previous posts from this week. 'nuff said.
2) Goa. We are going to Goa. Goa has been on my 'Place To Visit Before I Die' list for many, many years. My camera is happy-dancing as I speak/type.
3) Winning. I think I mentioned a couple months ago that I won 2nd place in a video-creation contest for Devika's video? Well, just found out that I won 1st place for a video-creation that I submitted for last month's 'Birthday' themed contest. Nice to have some recognition.. and nice to win a couple hundred bux! Thanks to my brother-in-law for being the subject and having his birthday video posted online for the world to see! Yes, I owe you many beerz. :)) Ok, vodka bottles.
4) Mom is feeling better. The virus has improved immensely, and she sounds much better. Had an appmt yesterday at IU Med Center with a team of 4 amazing doc/oncologists. They aren't super-confident about her new chemo, but they have other plans-of-attack if it doesn't work quickly. Nothing like a team of the best. Let it motivate you mama! Kick the crap out of this thing.
5) Ok, I have decided to stop working for awhile (or working much..) when Devika comes home. I want to help Maya work thru this aggression issue she is dealing with (and omg it is sooo hard), and I often wonder if part of the issue is the fact that she needs more of me. I also am fully aware that Devika will very very likely have attachment and adjustment issues - being 13 or 14 months when she joins our family. That is a full-time job coming at me. A fantastic, much-anticipated journey.. but not without obstacles.
That being said.. I have a FABULOUS work-related endeavor in mind. I think I'll just sloooowly cultivate it, and start working on it when my family is a bit more stable and ready to share me with clients. :) But seriously - it is a GOOD.. scratch that.. GREAT.. idea, and it is so very difficult not to work towards it right now!! argh. Ok. Enough type-A.. deep breath.
6) This is actually part of item #1, but I am SO very excited to be filling out my Visa request forms!! It has triggered some memories, and I'm flashing back to Maya's process, and how amazing it was. Especially the first time meeting our baby. I just cannot WAIT to meet our little Devika and bring her into our family! I have to go to Maya's school tomorrow to join in her birthday celebration (her teacher was sick today, so it was rescheduled) and read a book that I had to write about her life - to her class - and I hope that I don't do something silly like choke-up when I get to the part about her becoming a big sister. :) Haa.. Nothing like scaring 23 preschoolers.
And btw, isn't a class of 23 just incredibly ridiculous??? I did not know it would be so large, and I'm considering pulling her out if her behavior does not change in the next couple of weeks. Bringing Devika home is surely not going to help her issues. Hmm. This is a tough one..

Ok don't make fun of me. I luv this song, and the line from it popped into my head earlier. Must be my Catholic upbringing. They get into your head.. ;)) I choose to blame my sister (Sr Marie.. who, in real life, reminds me of the character that Whoopie plays).
I hope all of you have an amazing week, and I think I might purchase a lotto ticket tomorrow! Peace.

2008-09-08T19:58:00.002-07:00

Well if this isn't just our lucky day! :)
I picked up the mail today - and lo and behold - there is our happy little letter from CIS! Fingerprints are complete and the updated info sent to Delhi.

Yay!

Getting closer by the minute!!!!!!

FINALLY!!!!!!!!

2008-09-08T08:22:00.002-07:00

We were granted Guardianship by the judge in Kolkata today!!! Yippeee! Finally Finally Finally!
Thanks to all for your kind thoughts and prayers over the past 7 months. This has been quite a long and painful wait for our family. Now we need the judge to sign the papers, ship them to the US, complete the passport process, and get our fingerprint update back from USCIS. Lots of things to happen in a hopefully very short time - but the big steps are all complete now!
Better start packing.. :))

2008-09-04T15:27:00.002-07:00

Isn't this a lovely photo? Yes, this is the view from the back of our home. They parked this monstrosity atop the dirt mountain yesterday, and it hasn't moved since. I HOPE they move it tomorrow. I'm going to be seriously annoyed if I have to look at this all weekend. It's the view from my kitchen windows also. Luckily our trees have grown in enough to hide much of the mess.
Yes, they are building in the open space behind us. Very sad. Oh well.. at least it is not the lot directly behind our house - rather it is the lot behind that lot. Sniff.. sniff.. we have lost part of our pretty view.

Maya, however, very much enjoys the view now! The girl likes her construction vehicles. I asked her today what she would like to dress up as for Halloween, and she said 'An elephant.. no, a tiger.. no, A BULLDOZER!'. sigh.

We're still having issues with Maya's aggressiveness. She is being overwhelmed at school (my theory.. there are 23!! kids in her class) and has been hitting/pushing some of the kids. Only the girls.. and only the younger girls. Yes, my daughter is the bully. {eye roll}
Yesterday, she and I had a meeting with her teacher to discuss the issue. We are both going to follow the 'Love & Logic' parenting/teaching methods.. and see if the consistency will help us to pull her through this phase. I have also taken away her beloved Thomas the Train toys.. and will begin returning them only if she does a better job of keeping her hands to herself at school. I did this on Sunday (after she hit poor little Sammy over the head several times at a dinner party), and so far she has had a much much better week. Hopefully all of this will work and she won't backslide too much when we bring Devika home. Luckily she has a completely wonderful teacher who is very interested and positive about helping her.
Not much else going on.. my mom is starting to finally feel a teeny bit better. This cold/virus she has been dealing with is wicked. Just not easy to fight anything with so little white blood cells. Thanks everyone for your prayers.. keep 'em coming.

Potential Court Date!

2008-09-02T20:49:00.003-07:00

A little news today ~ we have a court date! Now, we completely understand that many, many things can happen to cause this court date to be delayed.. but we are going to THINK POSITIVE!
{drum roll} September 8th.
We are sending out positive vibes, prayer requests, etcetcetc.. and we hope that we will receive happy news on the 9th! The 9th, btw, is Maya's birthday - what a stupendous birthday gift this would be! {Of course we are also waiting on fingerprints now.. but let's not ponder that at this moment.}
I think this is a fab reason to post a Seal video.. ;))) (luv him) No sappy songs today.. let's throw some energy behind this appeal!

Hold On, Toto!

2008-08-27T10:00:00.004-07:00

Ok, feeling better the past few days. Thanks for everyone's kind words after my last depressing post. :) Please keep my mom in your prayers - she is fighting a very bad cold right now on top of everything else. THAT is scary, as her white blood cells are so so very low. She has also found out that she won't need to travel for treatment right now - there is one more chemo they are going to try for her. The oncologist at Mayo Clinic recommended it to her oncologist, and they started the treatment on Monday. Please please please let this work!!!
Moving on.. so we had houseguests (BIL, SIL, cousins) all weekend (friday thru tues).. and Maya did not adapt well to that situation. They had a 2 1/2 yr old girl and a 4 yr old girl.. and Maya was NOT interested in sharing and playing nice. She and the younger girl were constantly punching and smacking each other over the head. It was a very loooong visit for everyone involved!! Nice to see them, but not very relaxing. Hopefully it bothered them less than it bothered me. Probably b/c Maya does not have any siblings at home yet - we have a very quiet house. It changes drastically when other kids are here. I better get used to it!! And Maya def. needs a sibling - she has a serious case of 'only child' syndrome right now.
Speaking of which - NO - no news on Devika. We did get updated photos today, which was a nice surprise. Unfortunately, she is crying in all of them. :((( Those kinds of photos are so difficult to see - it's hard to see your child cry and not be able to comfort her. Praying to hear something soon - word from Kolkata is that the case should be heard by September 10th.

The photos to the left are from a hail storm that came through our area a couple of nights ago. There were several tornadoes.. and we did not see any of them!! Everyone is talking about how they watched the funnel clouds - and we missed it. Good grief! We were busy watching the huge hail and freaking out over how crazy THAT was (and worrying whether the pond fish would be hit by it - you can't really see from the photo, but the hail was slamming into the pond and sending huge splashes into the air) - meanwhile there are tornadoes blowing by. They came as close as 3-4 miles from our house. No sirens. Very scary. I guess next time we see a bad storm, we should just hang out in the basement and wait it out. I'm still appalled that we had no siren warnings. Not very comforting. The tornado photo was taken by my neighbor. YIKES.

Like A Dishrag

2008-08-20T13:40:00.003-07:00

..I'm feeling a bit wrung-out today. This has been a crazy week. I just want to go hike into the wilderness, away from people and phones and bad news.. and simply Be. {Photo to the left was taken last week at a canyon close to my home. I need to go back!}
Things that I am slightly concerned about today:
1. Maya won't use the toilet at school.
a) Plus, nanny picks her up 3x/week and I asked that she take Maya inside and practice using the 'big potties' at school at pick-up time to aid in the adjustment. Nanny is not very outgoing and I think maybe a bit afraid of a new 'pick-up process' and did not do what I asked. 'She didn't need to go.. I asked her'. Sigh. I don't care if she NEEDS to go.. I want her to get comfortable and lose her fear. She's a tiny kiddo and the toilets are large - and no one is in the stall to help her. She's overwhelmed and needs to work up to this. ..I thought we had talked extensively about this.. oh well.
2. Losing the nanny soon (we had to give her notice b/c this adoption process is taking forever and her hours are not flexible) and have a TON of work projects coming in the next few weeks. Though b/c she is leaving soon, I'm not going to be highly concerned with #1a. We gave her the option of working a different schedule and staying on with us, but she has yet to give us her decision on that. B/c it is taking so long and she is SO non-confrontational.. I'm assuming the answer is 'no' and she is just too nervous to tell us. Criminy.
3. Our fingerprints expired and I had to drive downtown yesterday to schedule an appmt to drive downtown on Saturday in order to be re-fingerprinted. That's right.. 2 1/2 hrs in traffic yesterday to schedule an appmt. Love the logic of this process sometimes! Good thing is that they told me that we did NOT have to pay $80/ea again (tho their website says that we do, so I am a bit hesitant to believe this).. and that they processed my request immediately so that we CAN go on Saturday and not wait to receive a schedule in the mail (as the usual process goes). My concern is that we will finally get Guardianship from the judge in Kolkata.. and be waiting on our fingerprints to clear. Murphy's Law eh?

Things that I am greatly concerned about today:
1. My nephew spent the past 1 1/2 wks with me b/c he has been 'floundering' a bit and trying to find his way in life (he is 18..dropped out of school last January..no job yet..). He joined the Guard and should be starting to do some things with that - drills, completing his GED. Thought maybe he was getting on-track, but he seems to be vearing off again now that he is back home and with his friends. My bro-in-law (the dad.. mom is from previous marriage) is about to have a stroke over the situation b/c he is taking full responsibility and killing himself to help the kid. Sad thing is that I can see that the boy has some serious issues that need counseling. He WANTS to be in trouble and to have life be hard on him. Thinks that is what he deserves in life. No logic and no getting thru to him. Needs serious help on this issue and scares me to death when I think that going off to war is in his near future.
2. Last but definitely not least.. My mom rec'd her PET scan results and they were not good. Actually, they really sucked. The cancer is being resistant to the latest chemo and has spread like crazy. It is now present throughout all of her skeleton. Luckily (if you can actually use that word) it has not spread to organs yet.. but that isn't far away, according to her oncologist. Just a matter of time. The oncologist stopped her chemo and suggested she consult a specialist at a cancer hospital. She will probably have to travel for treatment. Please pray with us that they find a treatment that will work for her and SLOW this beastly disease down. She has so much to live for. She hasn't even met her new granddaughter.. and I want my children to know their grandma!!!!

So that's been my week. Hubby is traveling all week and so stressed with work that he doesn't even have 5 minutes to talk on the phone during the day with me. No one to complain to.. :) Need a nice big glass of vino.
In interesting news.. I was contacted today by someone from the Children's BBC in the UK.. they are doing a tv show with clips of animals and kids.. and they want to use one of my videos that I've posted on youtube. How cool is that??
Happy Wednesday.

1st Day of School

2008-08-14T12:46:00.003-07:00

Today was Maya's first day of school! I was worried that she might get clingy and upset when I dropped her off.. but no! She grabbed her teacher's hand, waved at me, and yelled 'Bye-Bye Mommy!' as she walked into the classroom. I was so proud of her!
..until I picked her up later and she said 'I punched a girl in the face and the teacher told me that we don't punch people'.
Sigh.
I hope I don't have the only child expelled from preschool for violent tendencies. {eye roll}

Happy Birthday Devika!

2008-08-13T15:48:00.003-07:00

Happy Birthday Devika!!
We hope that you had a special day - maybe some extra milk cookies.. some extra playtime.. some special hugs and kisses. We can't believe that we were not able to be with you on this special day, but we will be with you soon. Hopefully it is only a matter of weeks before we hold you in our arms and kiss your chubby little cheeks! I promise you an xtra-special belated 1st Birthday party!! Hold out your little hand and catch the kisses that we are blowing around the globe to you...

Yes, I Am Alive!

2008-08-11T21:46:00.002-07:00

I can't believe that it has been almost a month since my last post! And what a month it has been.
First - we just rec'd a couple of updated Devika/Satarupa photos. Yay! She looks great. On the other hand, ARGH.. I can't believe we are not in India yet. More on this later in the post.
So where have I been for the past month? Believe it or not, we've spent most of the time traveling to see family. And somehow, hanging with the family keeps me so busy that I had no time (or rather, energy) to blog. Crazy.
We flew to IN and visited my family for a few days.. then flew to NY to visit my in-laws for ~a week.. then flew back to spend ~a week with my family again.
That week also included my 20 (omg yes, I did say 20!!) year high school reunion. I seriously cannot believe that it has been 20 years since I've seen most of these people. So bizarre. It was actually an amazing night though - I had sooo much fun! Plus, it was a night of 'closure' for me. There were a few unresolved issues that I had with a couple of people that happened to be from my class.. and I was able to resolve them in extremely positive ways. Extremely. Honestly, that night was fabulous!
Drawback of that night.. it took me 2 days to recover from it. No joke. It was over 90 degrees that evening.. we were outside on the bar's patio.. and the humidity was hideous. I don't think that I drank much beer that night, but I forgot to drink water. Oh and the shot of Jaeger didn't help (good god what WAS I thinking). ;)
So I also have had a couple of photo shoots and other work going on, so time has been very restricted. DH has been traveling 5 days/week for work and working while he is home. My nephew is staying with us for 10 days (leaving Thursday :(().. and I've been trying to prep for Maya's school-start. So life's been full!
Thankfully I've been busy though. Haven't had excess time to stew over this adoption. It is so hard now. Devika turns one year old on Wednesday. :(( I can't believe I've missed her entire first year of life. This SUX!! It is so difficult for us now. Having absolutely NO control over this is such a nightmare. Plus this timeline is completely screwing up our childcare situation and causing a ton of stress. Do we keep the nanny and pay her for nothing (maya starts school and we don't really need her until Devika is home now)? Do we lose the nanny and then crisis after Devika is home and we are ready for help? Can we afford to pay the nanny as well as Maya's school and all of the adoption fees that are coming up very soon?? ARGH. We actually gave the nanny her 30-days notice 2 wks ago, but haven't felt good about that decision. Now DH thinks we should keep her.. but I'm not sure that this is the right answer. Is there a right answer? There must not be, b/c none of the scenerios makes me feel any better. It would be nice to just have an answer and no longer deal with this issue. Maybe the nanny will find another job and end all of this debate.
Luckily Maya is doing very well right now - growing up so fast! She is getting SO much better with the hitting issue lately. It is really only an issue now if she is tired and/or hungry. She is much better at playing with kids and had sooo much fun with her cousin Andrew in IN! She has amazing conversations with me every day - I am constantly taken aback by how smart the girl is! I can't wait to see how she does with school - I think she will love it.
Wow.. time to get some sleep. This day began at 5 am yet again.. need sleep.. zzzzz

Small World

2008-07-13T13:25:00.003-07:00

Here's an interesting paradoxical-type news item: Our sweet baby is in Kolkata.. and the director of her orphanage is ~2 miles from my house right now. Siiiigh.
As hard as it is to think about that, I'm looking forward to speaking with her and hearing a first-hand account of our baby's development. We've been told that our little Devika is now 13 lbs and 26.4". She can now sit up from supine position, and can stand up when holding her crib rail. She walks while holding the hands of her Ayah, and is saying a few little words such as 'ma-ma', 'ba-ba', and 'da-da'.
So we're missing her first words and her first steps. As difficult as it is to miss these milestones, at least we know that she is doing well - which is a wonderful thing.
Her first birthday is exactly one month from today. Wish we could be planning a party.

In other news, my brother had his jaw surgery (1/2 of his jaw replaced with metal due to a very aggressive benign tumor). Crazy-difficult surgery, but it went very well. After the surgery, however, he was having some heart-racing issues.. major. Spent his hospital time in ICU so they could watch for heart probs. Turned out that he has a slight heart defect. Not life-threatening, but he has to make some lifestyle changes - mainly extremely limited caffeine intake. ACK!! I feel sorry for him, as he and I share a mega love for coffee/espresso. :((( Oh well, could be worse. He's very slowly recovering - still bandaged up and can't open his mouth enough to eat/drink anything more than liquids/pureed food. Yikes.

Pulling At The Heartstrings

2008-07-09T17:17:00.004-07:00

Someone posted a link to this story through our agency's email forum today, and though it is over a year old, it is still very relevant. Actually it is sad that this story was published in April of 2007.. and here we are in July of 2008.. and still waiting on the system to change. India is closer to the change - they have written up the new guidelines, etc.. but these guidelines have not been placed into effect yet. Actually it is somewhat impressive that they are as far along as they are at one year out - maybe one year from today things will be different and adoption timelines much, much shorter.

Anyhow.. here is the story.. it's well worth the read. {Note that the little girl they mention in the article is also named Devika!} Reading these type of stories makes me wonder if we will be able to wait the 3 years we are planning to wait before starting a 3rd adoption journey. I read this and want to take all the children right now!
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/asia/article1627008.ece

From The Sunday Times

April 8, 2007

India pleads: adopt our orphan girls

British couples urged to aid ‘lost’ 11 million

Dean Nelson, Delhi

INDIA is to urge couples in Britain and other western countries to adopt thousands of unwanted children languishing in orphanages throughout the subcontinent and save them from a life of poverty and emotional destitution.

There are more than 11m abandoned children in India, where a growing number of newborn babies are being dumped anonymously in cots placed outside orphanages in an initiative to deter infanticide.

About 90% of those abandoned are girls whose poor young mothers cannot afford to keep them. They face a bleak future as beggars, prostitutes or menial labourers if families cannot be found for them.

Last year only 4,000 children escaped that grim fate through adoption. Of those, about 1,000 were placed with families overseas and fewer than 100 came to Britain. Now, in a revolutionary change of policy, the Indian government has decided to increase the number of children available for adoption and to place thousands more with families in Britain, Europe and the United States.

Last week it announced plans to speed up bureaucratic procedures and make it easier for foreign families to adopt.

Under current rules the process usually drags on for more than a year. The new proposals call for a maximum waiting time of just 45 days. Ministers say the process must be accelerated so that loving homes can be found for the babies before they become institutionalised.

The change will be welcomed by childless British couples seeking to adopt abroad and finding their prospects restricted in countries from Romania and Russia to Vietnam, where curbs have recently been introduced, fuel-led in part by fears that adoption was being used as a cover for child trafficking. The British government warns prospective “inter-country adopters” that the process can take three years.

UK campaigners said this weekend that the changes in India were good news for its orphans and for western families who want to adopt them, but emphasised that there were still many British-born children in need of loving families.

David Holmes, chief executive of the British Association for Adoption & Fostering, a charity that helps to find families for hundreds of children every year, said: “It’s important to remember that even if India relaxes the rules these couples will still have to go through the same process that couples adopting within England go through.”

But he added: “Foreign adoption in India might be a little girl’s only chance and so we can see why getting a child into an adoptive family quickly is immensely important.”

At the Cradle orphanage in Delhi, five newborn girls are dumped in a “street crib” outside the security gate every week. A bell attached to the crib rings in a doctor’s room as soon as a child is left and the babies are rushed into one of two crisis wards where they are assessed, dressed, fed and treated.

Last week there were 10 girls and one boy in carrycots on the floor of one crisis ward, happily gurgling, sucking their thumbs and sleeping. Half of them will be adopted by families overseas who pay the orphanage £250, but the remaining babies will face sometimes insurmountable problems in being matched with an Indian family.

According to staff at the home, the darker-skinned babies suffer from a common prejudice in favour of fairer skin. Many will want the baby’s complexion to match their own, so that they can deceive relatives and pretend the child is their natural offspring.

An especially pretty two-year-old girl called Devika has been at the home since she was left in the street crib shortly after she was born and no Indian family has come forward to adopt her.

“She has dark skin,” explained one of the orphanage “ayahs”, or nurses. But she has now found a foreign family and will be leaving the orphanage in the next few weeks.

Devika and 130 others at this sprawling, spotless bungalow are among India’s luckiest abandoned children. Almost nine in 10 will find new families, and those placed overseas will live lives of comfort that could never have been envisaged had they been raised by their natural parents.

Many more orphans are living in poorly funded homes with dilapidated dormitories little better than prison cells and have hardly any prospect of escaping to a better life.

J K Mittal, chairman of India’s Central Adoption Resource Agency which oversees all the adoptions, admitted: “Our procedures are too cumbersome. It takes more than a year to adopt an Indian child from overseas. But it should be done within a couple of months.”

To adopt an Indian child, couples must be financially secure and must have been together for more than five years. They must be between 30 and 55, with a combined age of less than 90. Single people are eligible but not same-sex couples.

“Parents should educate the child about its own background and culture because when they’re older they will want to know about India,” Mittal said. “But the basic requirement is love — they must be able to love and care for the child.”

A Brush With Mr. Heebie-Jeebie

2008-07-07T21:15:00.003-07:00

Mom Instincts. Don't knock 'em.
Today I took my sweet little 2-yr old to get ice cream at a quaint little old-fashioned ice cream shoppe in our small town. It was late afternoon, and not a busy time for the little shoppe.. we were actually the only patrons in the shoppe other than a single, late 30-ish/early 40-ish man sitting at one of the 3 little wrought-iron interior tables. I placed our order with the nervous-looking ice cream scooper (not sure what the actual job name would be). She looked to be no more than 16 yrs old, and was obviously somewhat new to the role - as I asked what a 'coffee frappe' was, and she had to go look it up on her 'cheat sheet'.
She quickly put together Maya's strawberry ice cream with extra sprinkles, so I sat at a table to allow Maya to begin eating, while the girl worked on my drink and a salad I ordered to go (sounds odd, but they have the BEST salads). It took the girl quite some time to complete my order - I seriously think it must have been 10 minutes. During this time, the single man seated at the far table (not very far, as there were only 3 and I thankfully selected the furthest table from him) sat and stared at the ice cream scooper girl. It was very odd. He did not say anything to her.. simply sat and watched her work. He was not eating anything.. he had an empty coffee cup and an unread newspaper in front of him. He didn't look like he was just 'spacing out'.. he really was watching her.
Eventually he got up and approached the counter - and asked the girl for another coffee. She was busy making my salad, so it took her a couple of minutes to get to it.. and he stood by the counter waiting. I now had complete heebie jeebies from him, and he was standing silently behind me. The shoppe was so small that I could hear him breathing a few short feet from me, and I was completely freaked out. I started wondering if I should move my seat so that I faced him.. as I was worried that he was staring at my daughter in the way that he stared at the girl. Maya kept looking at him, but didn't say anything to him.. so I don't know if he was watching her or not. I swear, instincts were kicking in and I was feeling a bit of that 'fight or flight' mode kicking in. I felt suddenly like we were very alone and that the area was deserted. The shoppe was bizarrely quiet.. other than my chit-chat with Maya.
So FINALLY he rec'd his coffee and sat back down.. again staring at the girl. I was finally able to pay my bill and leave the shoppe. On our way out of the shoppe, Maya was feeling the effects of her ice-cream-sugar-high, and was saying 'dog-dog! dog-dog!' which she does when she is hyper.. usually she is chasing the dog at the time. As we pass the strange man, he says (while staring at Maya and never looking at me), 'You have a beautiful daughter there'. I said 'thank you' and continued toward the door. Maya decided to stop in her tracks, smile, and chant 'dog-dog' at him.
He smiled at her and said 'are you saying you want to be a go-go dancer when you grow up?'.
OK. THAT was inappropriate, wierd, bizarre, and frightening. I grabbed Maya's arm and we bolted out of the shoppe. I sat down with her a few feet from the entrance to finish our ice creams. I was considering going back to make sure the little ice cream scooper was ok.. but after ~5 more minutes, Mr Heebie Jeebie left the shoppe and moseyed past us, down the street.

{shiver}

Can I Eat It?

2008-07-05T08:27:00.002-07:00

Happy belated Independence Day to all my fellow American bloggers/lurkers/friends!
We enjoyed a laid-back 4th of July this year. Maya has never seen fireworks, so we bought some little fountains/sparklers/etc and set them off at our house (she absolutely loved them of course!). We were also lucky that we had a pretty decent view of the local fireworks show from our driveway. Unfortunately, the fireworks caused a large brush fire (where they were being set off), and the show ended early. No big finale! We were most disappointed.
Maya had a fab time though! Slap-happy beyond belief from staying up 2 hrs past bedtime! Crazy thing was that this was the first time she really noticed stars in the sky. It was a super-clear night, and the stars were amazing. We live far enough from big cities to not have much light interference. Maya was completely intrigued by them - even more intrigued than by the big fireworks!
Speaking of fireworks, Maya is in a 'Can I Eat It??' mode lately. Everything she sees.. especially if it is something new to her is met with the question 'Can I Eat It?' 'Can I Eat It?'. She was very distraught to find out that no, you cannot eat fireworks. Um.. owch.
And no, you cannot eat your pool noodle. And no, you cannot eat bubble wrap. No, you cannot eat Mommy's new sandals (what, is this girl part puppy??). And no, you cannot eat sand (though she keeps trying this new delicacy and finds it to be rather 'crunchy mom!').
I have nightmares that the girl gets expelled from pre-school for eating the playground equipment.

In other news, we are happy to report that ISRC (the orphanage in Kolkata) has finally received their new certificate! It is in-hand. The judge reportedly has a copy in-hand also and can now put our case on the docket. We aren't holding our breathe, but at least THAT delay is over. Please Mr Judge - hear our case!! We are missing sooo much time with our baby. :(( P L E A S E !!!

Hope you all had a fabulous holiday weekend!